This Razor Blade Was Meant For Me
by Boushi
Summary: Gaara wants to die. Lee won't let him. It turns out we have no control over how we die or even who dies in the end. There is boy lovey lovey, so prudes, beware but nothing past a very limey lemon.
1. Don't let memories go, of me and you

Gaara was a happy child per se. He could not remember a time when he was truly at peace. This was a disturbing truth for him. This caused him to be an unhappy teen and then young adult. His gloomy aura caused a slight hitch in his love life. Not to mention that he was gay and coming out had gotten rid of what friends he had left. His siblings were supportive but they were scared of Gaara's mood swings. Gaara took this as a sign that they too had abandoned him. Gaara, as you can you see never caught a break. He left for college to study literature. Friends were not easy to make at college, let alone being a depressed shut in. The people at college were a little nicer but that did not help him at this stage. Gaara knew it was just vicious cycle of staying in because he had no friends and he had no friends because he stayed in. His world was getting smaller and smaller. Temari had tried to get Gaara to a counsellor but he got to the door and then ran as if there was a monster on the opposite side of the threshold. Gaara was used to this monster. He was there all the time. Every time Gaara felt anything, he would crawl from the emptiness in him. It would tell Gaara that there was no escape and that the monster would be Gaara's only friend. He did not have a way out, you see. This was the only way the pain, the suffering and… it would be gone. That is why Gaara was on the roof of his dorm for the last five nights. And that falling feels like flying, he always wanted to fly. He would bring a pack of smokes and a note book with a pen. The wind would keep him company and he learnt to hate the sunrise. It meant he was still alive. He was weak. The need to die was not great to outweigh the fear of the unknown.

Gaara was walking to the stairs, when he heard someone running towards him. It was two guys were running down the hall and burst through the double doors to the girl's dorms. The last one looked back at Gaara. He and Gaara had an awkward encounter in the shared showers this afternoon. Actually, Gaara did not want to even want to think of it. Just the reminder was enough to make up his mind. It was tonight. He was sure of it. Temari called this morning. He had apologized. She did not know for what he was apologizing for, but she continued the conversation asking if he had gone to the counsellor she recommended last month. He said no and told her that he loved her and hung up. She had not called since then so he thought she was thinking it was one of his moods. The stairs took longer than usual tonight. He got to the top and pushed the fire door open. He lit his cigarette and sat for a second on the concrete. His breathing was even despite the fact he was minutes from death. It started to rain. _Perfect, the melodramatic ending to the tragic hero's death. I just could not have written something this fucking cheesy. _His thoughts then went to the note in his coat pocket. He flipped open the note to the first blank page. The entries were enough to explain why, he just needed to say goodbye. He just scribbled one line.

_So long suckers_

Gaara hung his legs off the edge of the roof. His cigarette hanging between his fingers and the note book on his lap was getting wet, bleeding the ink through the pages. His black hoodie was not doing anything to keep him dry. His jeans were getting uncomfortable and tight feeling as they slowly dampened. He wondered if his eye liner was running. It said it was water proof but he never believed the company. He was putting out the old smoke and lighting a new one before he was startled when the door to the stairs swung open. _Note to self, block door way on the next attempt._ He rolled his eyes and jumped on to the tar paper on the other side of the ledge before the person could see him. The two boys who had just ran through the doors downstairs were here with four girls who wanted to watch the summer storm. They saw Gaara and turned back. Again the last person to go back inside was the guy Gaara had a very awkward encounter with this afternoon. He lingered at the door for five seconds then followed his dorm mates. Gaara's determination wavered a bit with the interruption. He was thinking about whether or not the guys would blow the whistle on Gaara. He thought the guy was pretty cool. In fact that was what got Gaara in the awkward situation. He lifted one of the spare bricks, not that he could actually get it off the ground, and put it in front of the door. The vivid re-imagination of the guy showering and the moments that followed had renewed his resolve. He stepped up on to the ledge again. He pulled out a new cigarette as the one he had earlier was soaked. He put the note on the ledge for someone to find in the morning. It must have been five minutes before his foot was starting to leave the brick. He was shaking so bad. He wished that he could have done it the first time. The voice was coming. It was telling him that he was nothing, a coward for giving up. Gaara closed his eyes, not tonight. Tonight the pain ends, nothing the voice could say would talk him down. He was tired of being afraid all the time. There was no escape. He was past wishful thinking; tomorrow was not going to get better. There was still nothing to live for. His foot lifted higher, just a few inches from the cold, wet brick. The door started to move. The brick he had put in front of the door was rocking. Whoever was behind the door was physically fit. Gaara started to panic. Jump now or never. He was hesitating and leaning over the edge. He would lose his balance and gain it then lean farther. He nearly had himself off the edge when the door finally exploded light from the hall. _Now! Before they can grab me!_

"Wait!" He called. Gaara expected the police to just pull him back in to the tar, "Please don't jump…" Gaara looked behind him. It was the guy from the showers. _I can't fucking get rid of this guy! _The big brown eyes were looking right in to Gaara's. His bowl cut was slicked to his head. His green t-shirt was cling wrapped to his muscular chest from the heavy rain. Gaara was just being reminded to the shower eleven hours ago.

"Don't fucking try…" Gaara turned to face the city. Nagoya was a big city, a good city to get lost in. Gaara just wanted to fade in to the city lights. The rain was sparking along with the lights. It was good that it was raining because Gaara had started to cry. "I want this. You can't stop me."

"I get it, you're in pain," he was pleading, not a good tactic when dealing with a jumper, "I don't think I'll be able to sleep again if I knew you jumped because of me."

"You think you get me?" Gaara yelled and stepped down from the ledge to yell at him up close, "You do not fuck have a clue! I have nothing! I am nothing! Who is going to miss a weakling bitch? Huh? No one." The young man was taken back by Gaara's rage. Gaara pushed his hair back and jumped on to the ledge again.

"Y-you're right," you could hear the sadness in his voice. His brown eyes were looking down at his wet socks, "I do not know what happened to you but I know what wanting to die feels like." He was quiet. _Damn! The bastard knows I can't resist a good story. I suppose his not going to finish till I come down._ "My name is—"

"I don't want to know your fucking name," Gaara was not going to be here long enough to use it, "I just want go in peace."

"But it's not as bad as it seems," his voice was soothing among the harsh pings of rain hitting the vents on the roof, "There will be a sunrise and set no matter if you are there or not but I highly recommend it. Stopping to watch the sun will keep you young." Gaara was getting mad. He was stalling. It was making him nervous. He was wondering if the guy had called the cops after all. "I am Lee! I, uh, was the guy who , uh—"

"I know! I was there!" Gaara spat. He was mad Lee was being persistent, "can you make your point so I can plunge to my death?"

"The world wants you live," he was not making a convincing argument, "not to see you suffer but to see what you can do. You have not even seen the best of your life yet! You could do so much with your life!" As far as Gaara was concerned, he was going to amount to nothing. Why would he want to stick around to watch his life go down the drain? "Do you have any friends or family?"

"I-I have siblings…" Gaara had been trying not to think about Temari and Kankuro. Well, more Temari, Kankuro could go to hell according to Gaara. Kankuro and Gaara were stereotypical brothers. They would throw insults like well wishes. "I don't have friends."

"No you don't!" Lee smiled, "I am your friend, friend!" he stuck out his thumb and nodded his head. He was not the most socially inclined person.

"Don't pull the '_I'm your friend now so you don't have to kill yourself anymore!'_ trick," Gaara was trying not to burst out in full on sobs. The picture of his sister was passing through his mind over and over. He thought about how she would react when she got the news. He covered his face with his hands. He took a breath and uncovered his face. "I am going to die tonight." Gaara closed his eyes. A hand closed over Gaara's. He opened his eyes to see Lee standing next to him. He was taller and bigger than Gaara. If he wanted to, he could just grab Gaara like a football and save him right there. He knew that Gaara need to decide that for himself. At this very moment, no one could 'save' Gaara. All Lee could do was let him know that he was loved and would be missing an entire life of new experiences. And no one said that you could not use a little ultimatum as well.

"If that doesn't convince you," Lee inhaled and his broad chest expanded, "I'll jump for you. I'll take the pain with me." Gaara's eyes were the size of dinner plates.

"It doesn't work that way!" Gaara shook his head violently, "It's not like you even know me!"

"Either way," Lee shrugged, "You take a swan dive and I'll be there like an anchor." He lifted his hand and therefore Gaara's, shaking the two. "I can hold you but not for long, then we'd both go down—" Before Lee could say more, Gaara scratched the inside of Lee's wrist. He was hoping that the pain would cause him to loosen up for a second. Gaara jumped. As far as his small frame could throw him. He saw nothing but ground ten stories below him. His heart was beating slower than ever. The pulse was in his ears and he could feel nausea creeping in to his stomach. He was waiting for the feeling of falling when there was a tight pain in his shoulder. Despite the bleeding wound on his wrist, Lee hung on to Gaara's hand. The rush of blood to Lee's arm caused it to bleed faster. Lee cried out of pain and effort. Gaara was in shock. Lee pulled Gaara up on to the roof. He grabbed the guy's belt when he was half way up. Gaara did a flop on to the roof. Both of them were leaning against the ledge trying to catch their breath.

"That was incredibly fucking stupid!" Gaara bawled at Lee. He was crying again but the rain was still hiding it. It was Lee's turn to be stunned. Their hands were wet from the rain; they should have lost their grip. But he held on. Gaara was still here. Or not. He was half way to the door to the stairs. Gaara was heading for the razor blade. He may or may not be able to go through with the pain but he was willing to give it a try. It was better than having to face Lee every day and having known what goes on in his fucked up conscience. Gaara had just gotten his key in his lock when Lee was at the bottom of the stairs. Lee raced to get to the door before Gaara could lock him out. The lock clicked and Gaara ripped the door open and delve in to his room. Gaara did not see his roommate. He must be at some frat party or something tonight. He nearly got the door closed when Lee's foot got in the way. He was out of breath, soaked and bleeding. In this whole situation, the only person who sustained any real damage was Lee. Gaara had a sore shoulder and a bruised face from swinging in to the wall when he was caught mid-air, but more or less ok.

"Just let me in and I can see if you are ok?" Lee was not convinced that Gaara was done with death for the night.

"I'm fine! Leave me alone!" Gaara was not going to let this attempt go to waste. He was erratic now. His face was covered in panic. The whites of his eyes were shinning with desire and his forehead was twisted with pain. Lee was tempted to push Gaara to the ground to get in the door. "I'm not letting you stop me!" That was it, Lee shoved the door pushing Gaara on his ass. Gaara flipped over as fast as he could and crawled to the bathroom that was a foot away from the front door. He got in to the bathroom and locked the door behind him. He could only find his roommate's razor but Gaara was sure he would overlook a destroyed razor when he would see Gaara encased in his own blood. Lee was working on picking the lock on the door. Gaara had gotten frustrated and put the razor on the floor on its side. He put all his weight in to stepping on the razor and ended up putting one in the bottom of his foot. He let out a small scream. Gaara pulled the razor from his foot and stood up, balancing on one foot. Lee gave up picking the lock and just shoulder checked the door. The door frame split open and the handle was hanging at an irregular angle. Gaara looked Lee in the eye. He held the blade to his wrist.

"I'll fucking do it!" Gaara was still streaming tears down his face in pain and he glared at Lee, "You can't save me!"

"I know I can't save you from the pain," Lee was trying to remain calm, holding out his hands palm down, "But I can save you from yourself…" Gaara was starting to sob and lose his balance. He dropped the blade and Lee rushed in to catch him. Gaara passed out from exhaustion and pain. Gaara's head hung over Lee's shoulder as Lee picked him up bridal style. He made a note of how skinny Gaara was. He doubted that he was eating at all. Lee got him on the bed he was sure was Gaara's. The slipknot bed spread was not subtle at all. Lee took the sock off Gaara's foot and wrapped tightly around his foot. It was not bleeding that bad, surprisingly. Gaara was lucky, not that he would see that way. Lee looked for a towel in the bathroom and tied up his wrist. Both Lee and Gaara were going to need stitches but Lee was going to wait until Gaara was awake. He did not want to call a cavalry in for Gaara because that would upset him more. Lee settled at the end of the bed, back against the mattress, thinking about the person who saved him from himself.


	2. When you're too in love to let it go

Ok, Here is chapter two! Enjoy!

Again... I don't own Naruto and I am still broke...

* * *

Lee was indulging himself in a first person shooter game that was left in the PS3, when Gaara came to. He had not moved from the foot of Gaara's bed. Lee was fascinated by the game. He did not have one in his room and his parents hated video games. Gaara was thirsty and he had a head ache from crying so much. He quietly rolled to the edge of his bed. He touched his feet on to the carpet. He was not in the desperate suicidal mood any more but the way he physically felt right now, he kinda wished he was dead. He winced at the pain in his foot from just touching the floor. Lee had cleaned the cut and put an oversized Band-Aid on it. Lee had gone to the dean and told him he had hurt his wrist goofing around with his roommates. The dean gave him a first aid kit and told him to go get it looked at in the morning. It was still bleeding and he could feel the skin move in and around the cut. Gaara stood up on the one foot and everything was ok. He put very little weight on his injured foot and tried to hobble forward but he just yelled out in pain and fell on to the bed. Lee was there like a speeding bullet. He took Gaara's arm and put it over his shoulder. They teamed up and got Gaara to the bathroom. The scene had been cleaned up and there was not a sharp object in sight. Once at the sink, Gaara used his hand on the wall to steady himself as he took his arm off Lee shoulder. They were both quiet but there was a time for talking and a time to just gather yourself. Gaara filled the glass that was kept next to the sink and drank passionately. Lee stood next to him with his hand hovering over Gaara's rib cage, waiting for the skeleton to fall apart.

"You ok?" Lee was seriously considering just buying a fish tank so Gaara could live in it. Gaara was on his third glass and was getting ready to fill the fourth. He put the glass under the tap and filled the glass but did not drink it.

"I'm alive," he scowled. When Lee was this close he could see that Gaara did have eyebrows, they were just very thin and light blonde. Lee guessed he must dye his hair bright red, "I am not going to the hospital. They'll put me in a padded room."

"It's ok," Lee explained, "I already told the dean I was hurt horsing around so if they call to ask, the dean will just confirm that I borrowed a first aid kit for myself and my friends."

"You're still going on about that friends thing?" Gaara was putting his arm over Lee's shoulder so they could get their shoes on and go to the hospital.

"You know what I mean…" Lee was annoyed that he had just saved Gaara's life and this is was the thanks he got. He had got Gaara to the bed and set him down on the foot of the bed. Lee found some pool flip-flops in the closet and handed them to Gaara. The shoes were the right size for Gaara but his right foot was pretty swollen and he had some difficulty getting the shoe on.

"We can't take the train," Gaara pointed out because he had no money to take any other form of transportation, "They stopped for the night, but if we wait an hour they'll be running again." Lee looked at the clock. It was four am. I was going to be slow at the hospital at this hour and his wrist was not feeling good. Gaara's foot was getting pretty bad. He needed antibiotics and pain meds.

"No, I'll get us a cab," Lee's mother had just sent money this week but in two weeks, Lee would have to tighten his belt to pay for this cab ride. He got Gaara on his feet and they left the apartment. The entire building was quiet. Not a soul was to be found. This was a little odd for a Saturday morning. There was usually a few party animals littered in the hall because they passed out ten feet shy of their dorms. There were noises coming from the elevator at the opposite end to the stairs. Gaara's roommate was walking towards them, drunk off his feet. Gaara's hand tightened on Lee's shoulder and then he let go and pretended to stand on his foot. His roommate did not seem to think anything was off. He just yelled something unknown and hugged Gaara. He seemed to know what the drooling mess had said and replied that he was just hang out with Lee and now was walking him to his off campus apartment. His roommate nodded and continued down the hall. Once he was safely in the dorm, Lee held up Gaara and helped him to the elevator. They were on the top floor, so it was a long, silent trip to the ground floor.

They caught an electric cab, to both their relief. They looked out the opposite windows and very rarely looked at each other or to the front. Gaara was thinking if he had gone through with it, what would be happening right now? Lee was thinking on how he could befriend Gaara. He knew the guy was gay but he was not and did not want to get the wrong message across. If he had to break the poor guy's heart again, it might just kill both of them. The whole fiasco in the showers was proof enough. He did not know exactly what had happened. He had a class cancelled and he was out all night partying, so he decided to take a shower. Gaara had been in the shower already and was half way through shampooing. Lee stepped in to the shower and Gaara noticed him. Gaara's pale cheeks had gone red and that's when Lee guessed he was gay. It was after Lee started to soap up that things got weird. Gaara was not really doing anything and just standing in front of the spray of the shower head. Lee was not bothered by Gaara being gay. It was not like there was not any other guys in our dorm were gay. They just did not seem to mind living with other guys. Gaara after a few minutes turned off the water and ran out of the showers. Lee was a little worried that there was something wrong. Gaara was mortified and was worried that Lee might have seen what had happened. Gaara was usually ok with showering with other guys but he had a major jones for Lee. Seeing him all soapy and naked was no match for Gaara's willpower.

They got to the emergency entrance and Lee ran and got Gaara a wheelchair. They got to the reception desk and pulled out their IDs and medical information. Lee hated doctors and needles, but he decided to be brave for Gaara's sake. Gaara had been in a few hospitals in his day. His fears included public humiliation and his own mind, not doctors. The nurse was nice and gave the boys beds next to each other. Lee wanted to say something to the newly pale Gaara. He just did not know what he was afraid of.

"I'm sorry," Gaara was apologizing for the entire night. The roof, the wrist and the bathroom, the ankle was ok but everything else was fucked up in Gaara's life and he had just dragged another person in to it.

"You don't get to apologize until you're feeling better," Lee meant mentally. He did not want Gaara to have any more guilt on his mind while he is healing. "You are going to a therapist in the morning."

"I'm not a talkative—" Lee cut Gaara off before another depressed syllable could leave his mouth.

"That was not a question," Gaara's face resembled a fish gasping for oxygen out of water. "I don't think I could live through another night of this."

"Right and you really give a fuck!" Gaara said sarcastically. "I don't need your hero complex to know I have a problem. I don't need to trying to save me either."

"I can't save you from everything," Lee was repeating his lines from earlier, "But I can save from yourself."

"I really think you are just secretly in love with me and you can't admit it," Gaara was trying to make the straight man uncomfortable to shut him up, "So, you show up and save my life and I will magically fall for you right?" Lee could see what he was up to and just leaned over the divide between the beds. He motioned for Gaara to lean in to.

"How could you tell," Lee put his hand on his cheek and did the gay man hand with the other, "I did not think I was that obvious Gaara-chan." Gaara just huffed and sat back in the bed. He crossed his arms and pouted.

The doctor walked in and started to introduce himself. He was a shorter man in his thirties. His shoes were not real leather and his tie was a clip on. He was examining Lee's wrist and ordered T3 for the pain and a broad spectrum antibiotic. He told Lee that one the numbing agent hand gone to work they could start the stiches. Lee was starting to sweat when the nurse started to prep the IV and the doctor was putting the numbing agent in the area around his cut with a needle. After fifteen minutes of watching the overgrown baby get poked and prodded (Gaara was letting a giggle escape every now and then), the doctor came over to Gaara's foot.

"This is by far worse than that wrist," the doctor was nearly nose to foot, trying to get a good look, "I give you stitches but if you are having troubles flexing your foot in a few days, come back to the hospital to get the tendon looked at." The doctor looked through Gaara's file and wrote down the meds he needed like he did with Lee. But the nurse was new and asked the doctor if he was sure that Gaara would only get Ibuprofen. The doctor had to explain in front of Lee that Gaara had a history of abusing narcotics. Lee looked at Gaara. He shrugged and just stared at his feet. He never told anyone except his sister that he had been an addict. Once he was sober, he was told he would go back to the treatment facility if he relapsed, he knew it was just easier to cooperate. Lee was getting to know Gaara very quickly. Lee felt very protective of the shut-in now that he had saved him.

After an embarrassing moment of Lee needing to hold Gaara's hand while getting stiches, a grandmother across the hall was laughing at the boys. Gaara had to go through the same thing, twice as worse, half the meds and on one of the worst days of his life. Lee had tried to hold his hand but Gaara was being a stubborn idiot and just held on to the mattress. Once Gaara's foot was bandaged up tightly, it was feeling a little better. They got their things and started to leave the hospital. They grabbed the bills and prescriptions at the front desk and went outside to catch a cab. Gaara pulled out he smokes and lit up. The smoke felt like velvet in his pining lungs. Lee just watched the smaller man out of the corner of his eye. He was not shaking anymore but Lee do not like how skinny he was.

"You need to stop smoking and eat more," Lee stated, "I don't like how skinny you are."

"I am happy just the way I am," Gaara took another drag of his cigarette.

"Obviously you are not happy," Lee was not usually a mean guy but he was tiered and this was not one of those moments where you could beat around the bush. Gaara just glared at Lee from the corner of his eye. He was not happy about Lee being the one he had spent the night with. The agony of reliving the memory every time he had to look and the athlete's body, Gaara was thinking he should have just jumped the first time round.

* * *

Gaara woke up to his door being pounded down at eleven in the morning. Whoever was culprit was going to die by glare from Gaara. His roommate was borderline comatose, so he just got up and answered it. There was a mess of yellow hair then Temari's voice could be heard over the yelling. She was hugging him to the point of endangering his ribcage.

"What were you thinking? A frat party?" Temari was not making sense even though Gaara was fluent in German too, "Are you taking your meds?" From the mess of hair Gaara could see the award winning smile of non-other than Lee. Gaara glared. He knew this was Lee's doing and he would pay. "I found your friend on the way over. He says he was the one who took you to the hospital. Did you need stitches?"

"Yeah, five. How did you find out I had been to the hospital?" Gaara had not picked up a phone since he got home at six-thirty.

"The hospital had me listed as your emergency contact," she had released her death grip on her little brother. She rubbed his shoulder and he avoided the connection, "Well, if you are ok, here is your money for the week and here are some supplies. I noticed you need more razors, although I don't grow much hair anyways!" She handed him a grocery bag full of food and toiletries.

"Temari!" Gaara gave her the _you_ _need to leave, now!_ look. They were talking in German but he was still not sure that he needed that announced in the hall.

"I'm gone," she put her hands in the air, "I'll let you friend annoy you, byebye love!" Gaara wanted to hurt that woman some days. Lee put a water bottle filled with something that definitely not water in front of his face. Gaara gave a weak look. He could not figure out what it was.

"Is it edible?" Gaara swallowed back mild nausea.

"It's a protein shake!" he was shaking the bottle to demonstrate that it was, in fact, a shake. "Gai-sensei says it's really good for gaining weight. It tastes like chocolate milk!" Gaara was sold. He grabbed the bottle and chugged back two gulps. It was not the same as regular chocolate milk but it would do. "So, your appointment is in half an hour."

"What appointment?" Gaara knew he was talking about the therapist but he was trying to play dumb, "Oh, yeah, not going."

"I can go get Temari…" Lee smirked. Gaara got his coat and stepped out of the dorm.

"So, what's the shrink's name?"

* * *

Gaara did not feel like he accomplished anything by staring at a forty year old lady. At least give him thirty and a decently attractive man. He knew how the silent game worked in therapy. They silenced the talk out of you. They let you get to the point where you become so uncomfortable that you talk to keep from going crazy. Gaara was crazy, so there was nothing to lose. The end of the hour was up. Gaara and the shrink stood up at the same time like two sides of a mirror.

"How long ago to you last attempt suicide?" she had caught him off guard. He did not know what to say but the truth.

"Last night…" Gaara looked at the door. Lee was waiting for Gaara to make sure that he stayed the full hour.

"You should come tomorrow but this time let's meet for lunch," she opened the door to the waiting room. Gaara nodded and glared at Lee. He smiled and gave thumbs up. Gaara walked up to the receptionist. She asked who she should bill. Gaara gave the name of his father, David Schwartz.

"Your last name is Sabaku?" Lee was confused.

"My father remarried," Gaara turned and started to walk out of the office, "I liked my step mom more than my dad so I took her name."

"Is she here in Nagoya?" Lee asked.

"She was…"

* * *

The line at the cafeteria was long and Gaara's foot was starting to hurt. He wanted to just go upstairs and go back to sleep. Lee was ranting on about the swim team having to meet earlier each day because he had so many clubs to attend. Gaara did not know how Lee did it. Good grades were not that hard for Gaara but the sports and the parties were something he could not comprehend. Lee went on to talk about this girl he liked, Sakura. Gaara did not like most girls. There were two girls in Germany that he had made friends with when he was about thirteen that were suspected lesbians. They had something in common, that what had drawn them together. But he had not seen them in years.

"Do you think she'd go out with me?" Lee was pilling food on his tray and making a mess, "I think we'd make the cutest couple!" Gaara's foot was hurting, his stomach was uneasy looking at this much food and the cutest couple comment was all he could take. He dropped the tray on the counter and limped out of the cafeteria. Lee felt a bit guilty. The guy was fresh from the shrink's office and he had gone on about girls and his love life. On the other hand, Lee knew he had to establish the fact that Lee could never love him in that way. The doubts in Lee's mind were chewing at the walls of him conscious and he dined that he could ever love Gaara as anything more than a brother. He was helping the guy get back on his feet. Lee pilled more salad on to his plate, most spilled on to his tray.

Gaara had gotten back to his room that was vacant. The one thing he liked about his roommate was that they were never in the room at the same time except to sleep. Gaara spread out over his bed and started to relax. He wanted to sleep but he was still mad that Lee was trying to bring him in to his love life. He liked the man for fuck sakes! How was he supposed to just tell him to go chase pussy? Gaara knew that it was the oldest story in the book, but he fell for the straight friend anyway.

No more! I will have more by sunday night but till then, stay out of trouble!


	3. Neurotic to the bone, no doubt

Yo! So, this is a LONG one! I recomend a streatch and pee break before this one! I couldn't just leave you with nothing juicy so I just kept this as one long chapter. Also, if you are a fan of Sakura, I am soooooo sorry but there is some bashing... Not what I intended but that's the way the cookie crumbled! On the subject of warnings, this is were things get frisky so from here on in, don't be surprised if someone get naked.

Disclaimer... Still broke and no, I have not graduated university.

* * *

Gaara spent his afternoon catching up on school work. When he started to think about jumping off the roof, he did not think that homework was that important. He read a few books and finished two essays. His roommate had not returned yet, so he had the stereo turned up loud enough for Gaara but not too loud for some people outside his room. Gaara was not planning on leaving his room in the next twelve hours, so he put in PJs on. He kinda needed a shower but after yesterday, he was scared of going during day light hours. He thought he would go at eleven when everyone was already out getting drunk. He had changed the bandage on his foot. There wasn't much blood and the swelling was going down. He took two Advil and his antibiotics and started to study for geometry. He hated all sciences but he needed to take two or they won't hand out the degree. It was getting close to four and he was hungry because he had eaten the protein shake in the morning and had nothing after that. _Tough shit, I don't want to go down to the cafeteria._ He was having a hard time focusing on the text book but kept at it for fifteen minutes. The pain in his stomach was louder than the pain in his ass from geometry. There was a knock on the door. Gaara did not just open the door this time. He looked through the peep hole and saw Lee holding a pizza. Gaara had a love affair with pizza. If he could have he would marry pizza. He opened the door with enthusiasm. Lee smiled and gave his thumbs up.

"Hello friend!" Lee had changed from his green track suit to the green shirt and jeans. He was certainly built but not like Gaara's roommate who had a vial of HGH under the sink in the bathroom and looked like an Asian version Ronnie from the Jersey Shore. Lee had muscular legs that were accented with boot cut jeans and his shirt was the perfect size to see all the nice cuts from his muscles, the shirt could have been tighter in Gaara's opinion. "I brought you food! So, you don't have to go stand in line."

"Thanks. I was just getting hungry," _Lie, again. If you keep this up Lee won't want to hang out with you anymore. _"Come in." Gaara turned to the side and let Lee in the door. Lee looked at the bathroom door and felt guilty. _There must have been a better way to get the door open._ Gaara was limping again. Lee was worried that he was not taking anything for the pain.

"Um, I can fix the door if you want…" Lee was trying to make up for the girl talk earlier by being helpful and bringing food.

"No, there is a guy coming from the school tomorrow," Gaara was sitting and digging in to the pizza. There were vegetables on the pizza but Gaara was grateful anyways. He took a piece of pizza and tried to hand it to Lee. Lee shook his head.

"Gai-sensei would kill me," Lee had mentioned him before but Gaara had no idea who this person was.

"Who is Gai?" Gaara asked. Lee's jaw dropped. Gaara was about to laugh at Lee's goofy face.

"Only the best swimming coach in all of Japan!" Lee's arms were stretched out to make sure Gaara knew he meant all of Japan. "He had won the Olympics himself in 1991! He has had five Olympian swimmers that he has trained!"

"Ok, Ok, I get it," Gaara nodded between mouthfuls of pizza. "He's good."

"No, not good, great!" Lee puffed his chest in pride. "I can't wait to win the Olympics…"

"I sure you will," Gaara smiled and Lee smiled right back. Lee sat down next to him and examined the pizza box. There was only a third left of the pizza. Lee looked at Gaara and then back to the pizza box.

"You ate all of that?" Lee was astounded that Gaara's small stomach could hold that much food, "make sure you don't get sick."

"I like pizza…" Gaara was embarrassed that Lee noticed that he had binged on the pizza. Gaara was probably going to be sick later if he kept eating. He put the pizza down and stopped, and his stomach did feel tight and uncomfortable.

"No, problem," Lee messed Gaara's perfectly spiked hair and of course Gaara just glared, "I'll make a note to bring pizza every Sunday!" He cautiously picked up the pizza and tasted the cheesy pie. Lee had not eaten pizza in years and even then it was just ok. This pizza for some reason tasted good, like the years of abstaining from Italian finger food made him appreciate it so much more.

* * *

Lee was at the gym the next morning when Sakura walked in. She was sporting the usual spandex tank-top and yoga pants that hugged every womanly curve of her body. Lee was feeling confident that she would agree to lunch today. He finished his bench presses and strutted over to the treadmill Sakura was on. Her pink pony tail was swaying back and forth with each stride and her breasts were gently rising and falling. Lee was almost in a trance. He knew he liked Sakura for her body and the fact that she was physically fit. She was very dedicated to her physical training regime. Lee liked that in a person. But she was a little mean and short tempered. She kept beating on her good friend Naruto whenever he said something wrong. Lee had not been the most successful man with the ladies this year and he had decided to defend his man hood. He was going to date Sakura, even if it did not work out, just to say had gone out with a girl this year. Lee got on the treadmill next to Sakura. He set a nice brisk jog and turned his head towards Sakura.

"Hey Sakura-chan!" Lee smiled and waved. She just snorted and kept running.

"Hi Lee…" she was never a big fan of his over enthusiasm.

"I was wondering if you wanted to go for lunch?" She was surprised and shocked. She nodded.

"Just lunch, right?" she asked. Lee nodded. Sakura thought he was a nice guy and there was no harm in lunch.

* * *

Gaara went to the small bistro just around the corner from campus. His therapist said the food there was good. Gaara was not going to spend his cigarette money on food so he was only going to buy a drink and sit and listen to the shrink. He got to the front of the bistro and waited till the shrink showed up. Her name was Tsunade but like Gaara cared. She got out of the black BMW and handed the keys to the valet service man. She was tall and imposing and liked her suit skirts. She was texting and walking in heels. Gaara was impressed. When he was in high school, he was always going out to gay bars and sometimes he would go out in drag. He knew how hard it was to keep on your feet with heels. She looked up at Gaara and took him by the arm and led him in to the restaurant. It was fancier than Gaara was used to. There was business people and gold-diggers left, right and center. The waiter put them on the terrace next to the street. It was a nice little spot for lunch.

"So, How was your day?" the shrink was trying to be casual but the hidden message was did you try to kill yourself in the last twenty four hours?

"Fine," Gaara was not happy that he would actually have to talk to this woman for a whole hour, "My friend brought pizza over last night."

"Is this the same friend who came with you to the office yesterday?" she looked up from her menu. Gaara did not even bother with the menu. He was hungry but he was feeling guilty about the pizza he ate last night.

"Yeah," Gaara nodded, "He was making sure I was ok." Tsunade noticed the menu had not been touched.

"Have you been here before?" Shrink asked.

"No," Gaara glared, "Not my style."

"So, what will you be having?" Tsunade saw where this was going. Not a lot of people could stay that skinny and eat healthy meals at the same time. His friend making sure he ate last night concerned Tsunade too.

"Nothing," Gaara scoffed, "I not hungry." He was lying and Tsunade did not like liars. "Besides, I'm broke." Tsunade knew that was a lie too. She slapped down the menu and looked Gaara in the eye.

"Pick something off the fucking menu so I can give my husband a heart attack when he sees my credit card bill!" Gaara was leaning as far back he could in the chair and people were staring. Gaara did not like people staring. "Now, you can order anything you want and you don't even have to eat it, just pick something." Gaara picked up the menu and stayed quiet. Tsunade knew a lot of people had tip-toed around Gaara's moods and actions. He needed to learn some of those behaviours were not ok. Then she could try and teach him relieve the emotional strain in a healthy way. The waiter came to the table and asked for their drink orders.

"Two beers," Tsunade ordered the most expensive brand on tap. The waiter bowed and left the table.

"I thought you not supposed to give alcohol to a depressed person," Gaara just wanted to have one point over the Shrink. He did not like losing in the conversation.

"You are not on medication and I don't think one beer would cause any fatal reactions," Tsunade was reading the menu again and was not paying attention to the unhappy guy at the other side of the table. Tsunade ordered the maple baked salmon and Gaara got the deluxe bacon cheese burger. The food was at the table relatively fast. The table was silent till the food was delivered.

"You know," Tsunade started but Gaara knew it was going to be another life lesson lecture, "if you ate more balanced meals, you would not feel so guilty later."

"Who said I was guilty?" Gaara snarled then took a big bite of his burger. He was feeling he could not finish the burger without getting sick, but just to show the Shrink he was going to eat it all.

"Please, slow down," Tsunade rolled her eyes, "I am not mopping up puke from the bottom of my car when I drive you home." Gaara was embarrassed again. He did not like this woman. She was trying to make him in to a functioning human and almost succeeding. Gaara put the last half of the burger down and took a sip of the beer. It tasted not different than any other beer that Gaara had drank. He did not see what was so special. Gaara took a bit of a break from stuffing his face and pushed the french fries and salad around his plate.

"Where did you go to school?" Tsunade asked in a break from her salmon and brown rice.

"Some in Germany, some in Japan," Gaara did not look up from leaning tower of fries, "My father moved around a lot."

"That must have been exciting to see different parts of the world, huh?" Tsunade smiled and put her napkin down as a sign of the end of her meal.

"Not really," Gaara sighed, _here come the childhood sob stories_, "I did not have a lot of friends growing up."

"From moving so much?" Tsunade ordered the soufflé and the waiter disappeared again.

"Yeah," Gaara was not one for sharing desserts, so he ordered his own cheese cake, "I had two friends when I was thirteen, two girls that were gay too. But then we moved to Tokyo when I was fifteen and we have been here ever since."

"How is your Japanese so good?" Tsunade had no trouble talking to Gaara in Japanese. He had only lived here for six years.

"We were here when I was two till I was ten. Then we moved back to Germany for five years." Gaara was avoiding talking about his mother and step mother. He was special to both women and he was never in a good mood when they were brought up in conversation. It was the source of most of his self-destructive behaviour.

"And you father is German. Was your mother Japanese? Is that why you last name is Sabaku?" Tsunade was keeping her tone of voice even and comforting. She knew that most of this would stem from childhood trauma and he did not want embarrass Gaara in public by having him cry or break down.

"No, my mother was German as well," Gaara shifted in his seat, "She died when I was born. My father remarried when I was two and my siblings and I took the name Sabaku, after our step mother." Gaara was taking a deep breath and decided to take out a smoke, "Is it ok if I smoke out here?" Gaara was not sure what the restaurant policy was on smoking on the terrace. He put the smoke behind his ear for safe keeping.

"Yeah, it's ok," Tsunade waved the waiter over and told him to bring an ash tray for Gaara. When the waiter went in to the building through the stain glass doors, Lee was coming out on to the terrace, led by another waiter. Gaara was going to wave at him and distract himself from the uncomfortable conversation. He had his hand half way up then he saw Sakura come through the door behind him. Gaara's heart was squeezed in to the size of a pea. He knew Lee liked her but he never knew that he would move so fast. Gaara whipped around to face the opposite direction.

"Hey, look!" Tsunade waved at Lee and Sakura, "It's your friend." Gaara got mad and stood up from the table. He was not going to be put through this.

"He is not my friend," he turned and left the table. Lee was walking towards him smiling but Gaara just rushed past him. Lee's face dropped and he became confused. Was there something wrong? Was it a bad session with the shrink? Lee was about to go after Gaara when Tsunade followed after him with lightning speed. Lee was torn between staying with Sakura and following Gaara.

"Is there something wrong?" Sakura asked, breaking Lee's concentration.

"No, I just thought I knew that guy…" Lee smiled at Sakura and ushered her to the table.

"You know that guy is roommates with Chouji and he says he is gay!" Sakura was whispering over the table.

"Really?" Lee was trying not to judge Sakura as a homophobe.

"It's not that I have anything against you people and—"

"You… people…" Lee's face had gone white.

"Yeah, I know you're gay! Everyone does!" Sakura did not seem to be affected at all by the announcement she had just made and picked up the menu and continued to talk. Lee was starting to sweat and panic. He was not on a date with Sakura but lunch with his best gal pal. Lee became very angry, very quickly. He was determined to sit through lunch and then go to his best friend Neji and find out what was going on. "Oh, and Sasuke bought us the most romantic ski vacation for this Christmas!" Sasuke was Naruto's best friend and Lee was starting to make the connections. Sakura was forced to hang out with Naruto at the gym because he was Sakura's boyfriend's best friend and that's why she hated him so much. And the only reason that Lee was sitting with Sakura right now was because she thought he was a flaming homosexual.

"So, uh, you and Sasuke, huh?" Lee forced a smile.

"Yeah, I know, right?" She giggled, "The dark, quiet, sensitive artist with the bubbly cheerleader, like total opposites! I don't know how we do it but he is the sweetest man there is… He even said that loved me so much that was willing to wait until we're married till we do it!" Lee just nodded uncomfortably and was saved by the waiter coming to take their food order.

"I'll have the spinach and goat cheese pizza on whole wheat crust," Lee thought about his order while Sakura ordered the same. Maybe there was a reason everyone thought he was gay…

* * *

Gaara was walking out the front door when Tsunade caught up to him. She touched his arm and he pulled away violently.

"I am not going back there!" Gaara yelled at the Shrink.

"I'm not going to make you do anything," she explained calmly, "I'll go get the take out containers then I'll drive you home, ok?" Gaara nodded and pulled the cigarette from behind his hear. Tsunade went inside to pay for the meal and get the take out trays. He walked back and forth on the side walk. He could see the pink hair and green shirt if he leaned over the curb in the direction of the terrace which was guarded by a large hedge. The valet drove Tsunade's car up to the side walk as she was leaving the restaurant. Gaara put out his smoke and got in to the passenger side. Tsunade sped out of the street and headed for the campus. They did not say anything the whole five minutes. Gaara was grateful for that. Tsunade pulled in as close as she could get to Gaara's dorm. He undid his seat belt and grabbed his half eaten burger and his uneaten cheese cake. He got out and was about to close the door.

"You have to tell him exactly how you feel," the Shrink pleaded, "If he does not feel the same way then he'll let you know and you never know… you might be surprised." Tsunade could read people like a book and Lee was hiding a chapter that Tsunade wanted to read. She smiled and waved goodbye as Gaara closed the door in deep thought. It would be a disaster if Lee was repulsed by Gaara and he would be back at square one. But he could not get mad every time Lee looked at someone because for all Lee knew, Gaara was cool with just being friends. Gaara was going to tell Lee how he felt about next time they saw each other.

* * *

Lee was surprised that he lived through that lunch. Several times he thought he was going to vomit. He was in shock that everyone was thinking he was gay and hurt that Sakura had only extended her kindness because she thought she had found the perfect gay BFF. Sakura went as far as to ask if they could go out shopping sometime. Lee did not even know how to shop for himself! He would buy five of the same shirt just so did not have to pick out an outfit in the morning. Lee had decided to confront his best friend Neji. He was the guy on campus who everyone knew but no one saw. He was like a social ninja. He also had the DL on everything that was going on.

He got to Neji's room and knocked furiously. Neji's girlfriend was at the door. She was with them on Friday night when it was raining. Neji was trying to get Lee laid because he had found out that Lee was still a virgin. Neji got Tenten to gather her friends in force to try to deflower poor Lee. He was worried about Gaara and left early to see if was ok. The rest was ancient history.

"Hey, Lee," Tenten smiled and let him in the dorm. Lee strode across the room to Neji's bed where he was copying notes on neural biology.

"You knew what people were saying about me and you still tried to get me laid?" Lee was nearly yelling at Neji. He sat up and listened closely to his friend.

"Yes, I knew but I knew that it was just a rumour that was going around!" Neji defended, "I told everybody that you were straight and that the rumour was bullshit. I even tried to get you laid so that people would know that it wasn't true." Lee was starting to calm down and see what had happened. Lee did not spend the night with a girl but Gaara instead. Gaara's roommate, Chouji, saw them leaving Gaara's room at four in the morning. "Once Chouji told Sakura, there was no stopping it." Lee knew that he was known in the school as a star athlete. Word would spread like wildfire. Lee was very angry at a certain pink haired girl. "But on the subject, what were you doing with Gaara?"

"Uh…He fell and hurt himself," Lee lied. He hated lying this much, "I took him to the hospital." Neji nodded. There was some serious damage control to be done.

"You are going to have to date someone and fast," Neji turned to Tenten, "Is Ino still in the gutter about her break up with Kiba?" Tenten nodded. "Good, get her to come to a movie with us tonight. We'll make it a double date." Lee was feeling sick again there were so many lies and cover ups going on, he was losing track of them all. He did not like Ino. She had a daddy complex and was constantly attached to a guy. Lee wanted to go see Gaara. He would call the world stupid for caring so much. He had not seen the guy since last night. Once he was done making plans at Neji's room for the night of damage control, he went Gaara's room two floors up. He was going to tell Gaara what was going on before Gaara heard it from someone else. He knocked on the door casually. Gaara opened the door. He had a quarter of a burger in his hand and was chewing his last bite.

"Oh, You…" Gaara just turned and let Lee in. Gaara just kept walking, letting Lee close the door behind him. Gaara had all his school work spread out around him and movie was playing on the TV. Gaara turned the TV off and sat down to listen to Lee explain himself.

"I just found out there is a rumour about me," Lee started to explain but Gaara was just sitting cross legged, glaring at Lee. He thought he was here to tell Gaara what had happened, not catch him up on dorm gossip. "That because I spent the night with you on Friday, people think I am gay." Gaara was surprised. He knew Lee was straight. Actually that was the cause of most of Gaara's trouble. _And why would Lee care? It's not like he is actually gay._ "So, I can't hang out with you for a few days. Just until this blows over." Lee could see the pain in Gaara's eyes. Gaara was nodding and looking at the floor. Lee wanted to comfort him somehow.

"Well, there goes what I was going to fucking say," Gaara was standing up so that Lee could take the hint to leave.

"What were you going to say?" Lee was feeling at fault for Gaara's bad mood. Gaara did not want to say it any more. This would be considered bad timing. Gaara was mad and felt like hurting himself to get back at the people that have hurt him. He wanted everyone who was involved to feel the agony that Gaara was in right now.

"I was going to tell you that I like you," Gaara said with a blank face, "I don't want to be just your friend. I want to be more than what I am to you now."

"I don't feel the same way," Lee was having a hard time getting the words out of his mouth, "I want to be your friend and I want to help you." He took a step towards Gaara and he took a step back.

"Then I don't want to be friends anymore," Gaara's azure eyes were misting but he could not think of anything else he could do. Lee would not be helping him by hanging around. Every time he was with someone else it would put him five steps back in his healing process. "I will forever be grateful for helping me but I can't do this right now. Maybe in a few months but now is not the time." Lee agreed with Gaara. There was no use in setting him up for failure. Gaara ushered Lee out the door in silence. Once the door was closed, Gaara slid down the length and crumpled at its base. He was feeling depressed again. Not from embarrassment or fear but hopelessness. Gaara ran his fingertips up his face and in to his hair. He twisted the locks in his fists. Tears started down his cheeks. Lee was already walking to the front of the dorm hall. He was going to meet Neji, Tenten and Ino for a movie. Lee bottled all the emotions for the night. He did not want to see a movie. The last place he wanted to be was in a dark room with his thoughts. Lee was carrying lead in his feet and cement in his brain. He was missing the thing that had made him alive he left in Gaara's dorm.

Gaara found Shrinks number in his wallet and saw that she did have an emergency number. He called her and told her what had happened. She thought it was brave of Gaara to ask Lee to stay away while he was recovering. Gaara did not feel that brave but I was nice to have someone that had faith in him. She made him promise to call his sister when he hung up. He called Temari and told her about his day, minus the drama with Lee. Once Gaara had gotten through with his phone calls he finished his homework and his movie. I was getting late, around ten. He was going to go for a smoke and then shower. For a moment, he almost felt normal.

* * *

Lee was sitting in the movie theatre wondering how Gaara was doing. Lee was seeing the poor guy standing on the roof again or in his bathroom with a razor. Several times, Lee got up and said he was going to the bathroom but he was going to go back to the dorms and check on Gaara. He would talk himself out of it and go back in to the theatre. Ino was getting mad so he just stayed put after that. It was a dull romantic comedy and after a half hour, he actually realized how tiered he was from the day's events. Lee began to drift off. He was in that point between dreaming and awake when the lead actress sprouted red hair. The thin line of eyeliner got thicker and her over baked tan turned snow white. The steamy shower scene was just about to start when the movie theater's lights got brighter and the people turned in to tiles on the floor. The walls warped in to shower curtains and he was not sitting anymore. Lee was stepping in to the shower where Gaara had already entered moments before. He could see the thin, smooth frame of Gaara's back and he instantly wrapped his arms around Gaara's waist. His body was strong but delicate. The steam from the shower was tickling Gaara's shoulders, making them sparkle. Gaara turned to face Lee, giving him eyes that said it all. His hand was on Lee's chest, tracing the muscles and the water followed Gaara's fingers flowing in rivers of ecstasy. Lee was starting to get a little hot. Gaara's cheeks were glowing and full with temptation. His lips were perfect this close, moist and rosy. Lee was leaning in for the kiss when a loud noise woke him. Everyone in the theater was roaring with laughter. For a second, Lee panicked that they were laughing at him talking in his sleep or worse, someone noticed the huge boner in his pants. No, it was the lead actress slapping the male lead and delivering a cheesy one-liner. Lee did not just excuse himself but ran out of the theater all together. He could hear Neji yelling from the aisle that he would never get a date again. His legs got tired but he did not care, he had to keep running. His mind was going almost as fast as he was. Was that just because he was thinking of Gaara all night or was it his subconscious trying to tell him something? _A cigar is just a cigar, right?_ He ran until he was home. He fell in to his bed and tried not to think about Gaara. Nothing was working, not to mention his boner survived the sprint home. Lee was frustrated and decided there was only one way to fix this problem. Lee got up and pattered over to the bathroom. He would just have to deal with his emotions at a different time.

* * *

Ok, that's all for now! I might not have another chapter up untill the weekend. Jane!


	4. Comin' outa my cage

Ok, so there was some errors on the upload page of my account so that is why both these chapters are submitted together... Sorry ya'll!

Disclaimer: Don't own Naruto

* * *

Once Lee had left his bathroom, his cell phone did not stop ringing the whole two weeks till summer break. Every nose on campus wanted to know if it was true. Was Rock Lee gay? His circle of friends were avoiding him and Ino and Sakura never returned his calls. Gaara had made it clear that he was to stay away from him while he was getting back on his feet. Lee had opened himself to the idea that he was gay, or at the very least bi. He would have dreams of Gaara and found himself thinking of him more than the friends that had turned their backs on him. He went home to Miyagi for the break. His mother was worried that he was depressed and insisted that he spill the beans. Her and Lee's father had a bet going that either he was dumped by a girl or got second in the qualification for the Olympics (qualification rounds were in the coming fall, but his mother was forgetful). When Lee was honest with them on how he doubted his sexuality, his mother was very supportive. His father took a few days to wrap his head around the reality of it, but he was equally committed to making Lee feel loved no matter what. Over the next week, Lee had time to relax and the downtime helped with his mental battle. He knew that he was gay, although girls were once an object of desire, he had never been attracted to their personalities, simply their bodies. When Lee thought of Gaara, it was like looking at a complete picture. There was nothing that needed to be filled in or covered because every inch was perfect, inside and out. Even with these new discoveries, Lee was still feeling the bitter sting of loneliness. It was as if the act of helping Gaara that night had caused Lee to take on the pain Gaara was experiencing. Now, as Gaara got better, Lee was progressively getting swallowed by his own thoughts. He was putting on a brave face but he was slowly slipping. He had not touched water since he had gotten home. He desire to swim was vanishing and it was not very youthful of him to be this sad. Gai would be disappointed. Lee kept his body fit by running four hours every morning. He was waiting to see Gaara again so that even being near him will stop this monster from taking over.

The last weeks of school were slow and hot. Gaara had to stay indoors most of the time because he burned so bad. The Shrink was impressed with Gaara's improvement, she had even stopped threating to put him on anti-depressants. She got him to see a nutritionist who had a very different opinion on pizza. That did not last long but Tsunade did not see the point in pushing the matter because Gaara had gained twenty pounds over the four months she had been seeing him twice a week. He decided to try out for the wrestling team. He was the regional champion, junior lightweight in high school but dropped it he came out. Gaara was seeing a difference in his body. The bones softened out in to well-developed muscles and he had a better complexion. The smoking and junk food never went away and whenever Temari would get on his case, Gaara would quote the Shrink and say_ Baby steps! _Temari had bought them a vacation to the hot springs for a week. It was nice for Gaara to have a quiet place to write. He had almost finished a novel when they got back to Tokyo. Temari wanted to get her friend, an editor, to look at it but Gaara was shy about his creation. He was not ready to unleash it on to the world. The voices and fear were slowly dissipating. Temari was glad to her usual, sceptical brother back. To most people, Gaara almost resembled the old one. He still glared at everyone and was slightly on the neurotic side but he had a healthy glow about him. He even got back in to the gay scene again. He nearly had started a relationship but it was over the minute Gaara blurted out the name Lee at a very climatic moment. Kankuro came to Japan for a few weeks too. Gaara and him spent some time together and managed not to kill each other. Gaara was good and ready to go back to school.

There was a new course offered in the languages and literature department called _Classic Novels of the Romantic Languages_. This was a course covering stories like Madame Bovary and Don Quixote among others. Gaara was good at languages and wanted more credits for his major. He joined, not knowing that a clueless Lee was signing up for a course he knew nothing about. He needed a credit for an elective and he thought the class would be easy. Lee was good at many things, other languages was not one of them. Lee's first morning in the class was like he teleported back to ancient Greece. It was fascinating to listen to professor Hatake speak Latin, Spanish and French. Lee daydreamed of taking Gaara to an island in Spain, spending the rest of eternity with the cuddly panda. When the class had ended, Lee ran down the steps to the front of the auditorium to talk to the professor about the difficulty of the course. He was at the bottom of the steps when he saw that someone had already started to talk to Hatake-sensei. From the back, the red hair was unmistakable but it was longer and styled. The body was more toned and filled making him look like a model for expensive jeans or a new cologne. Gaara looked like he was doing very well. Lee was completely speechless. His jaw hit the floor and his head hit the roof. This was no longer the skinny, gloomy, pale and suicidal boy he saw four months ago, but a slim, confidant, intelligent, attractive man. Very attractive. Lee lost track of time and space because the next thing he knew, Hatake-sensei was looking suspiciously at Lee. Gaara stopped talking and turned to look at what had caught his attention. Lee snapped out his trance and smiled and gave his signature thumbs up. Gaara's face dropped in to a glare and stormed off. It was a little hurtful to see him take off. _It has been four months, which was plenty of time for Gaara to find himself…_ But as soon as Lee thought it he felt guilty and decided not pursue Gaara unless he initiated it.

"Lover's quarrels are not allowed in my class…" the stone faced man drawled. Hatake-sensei was tall as Lee but much lighter. He wore a scarf over his nose. It was legend that if you watched him eat, you could catch a glimpse of the face underneath.

"It's not like that…" Lee defended. After all, there had been nothing more than fantasies and awkward moments between them. Nothing had actually taken place to earn them the title of lovers.

"Ma-ma, you are in love with him then?" Hatake-sensei was raising his eye brow inquisitively.

"N-no—I mean I don't know," Lee was looking intently at the floor boards.

"You should, seito!" Hatake was having fun teasing the boy. He was very gullible. _Lover's quarrels are the spice of life! They are always welcome._ He thought but would never confess to the stuttering boy.

"Hai Hatake-sensei! I do!" Lee straightened up at the sound of a command. Lee was always respectful of his elders. He followed his answer with a bow. He heard a low chuckle erupt from the professor.

"Just call me Kakashi!" he laughed out loud, "It makes me feel old when people call me sensei…."

"Kakashi!" a voice from the top of the auditorium bounded, "Are you torturing students again? If this one goes to the board I am not going to bail you out!" The man was a little taller than Kakashi but much more tanned and beefy than Kakashi. When he got to the bottom of the stairs, he went nose to nose with Kakashi, making him look white as paper. "There is no good time to threaten, tease or mentally scar your students!"

"I am ok Sensei," Lee bowed, "I was just correcting Hat—Kakashi's information about a student."

"See Iruka," Kakashi pointed at Lee but giving puppy dog eyes to Iruka, "He's fine! No mental damage." Iruka was an early childhood psychologist, specialising in ADHD. Neji took a course from him last year. He also said he was dating another professor. Iruka looked up and down Lee's body, looking for any physical signs of trauma. Once he realized that Lee was indeed ok, he took a step back, giving Kakashi some space to breathe.

"I think we can help this one, Ru-chan," Kakashi said while looking at lee, "I know just the thing to help you…"

"Don't call me _that_ when we are at work!" Iruka was going beet red. Kakashi just smiled, the only indicator was is eyes squinting with happiness. He leaned in to Iruka's ear and whispered something lengthy. If it was possible, Iruka turned an even deeper shade of red, even looking a bit purple. "I suppose you could do that, but I am very confident that the school board would fire both of us!" Lee was a little disturbed by the event he was witnessing and tried to sneak out.

"Choto-mate!" Kakashi had grabbed the back of Lee's track sweater. He put something in Lee's pocket. "This address tonight. Wear something…flamboyant." Kakashi gave him a quick pat on the ass sending Lee running out of the auditorium. "Now… Let's go to lunch Ru-chan."

Gai was yelling encouragements from the pool side during the last lap of the junior team's practice and Lee could hear him from other side of the locker room down the hall. He was making his way to the team locker room for the wind-up for this fall's Olympic try-outs. Lee was very worried. He was not feeling as youthful as he would have liked and he was sliding on his practices. His thoughts were running wild about ways to make-up the practice time and could only come up with the idea to practice in to the late hours of the night. He was wondering if he should go to the club that was on the card Kakashi had given to him. _What was the meaning of being able to help me? _Lee could see from the corner of his eye that the wrestling room was open. He stopped and had a look. He had done wrestling in high school but had not gotten on the mat in years. The room was packed because it was try-outs all week. The people in front of me were kind enough to part and let me see. There were two lightweights on the mat. One was in a half nelson and they were circling on their toes. The smaller one on the bottom jumped to put his feet underneath him. Lee hopped he was not trying to do what he thought. The smaller wrestler got the four kilogram heavier wrestler in a fireman's take down (putting the torso of the opponent on their back, continuing the motion till the opponent is on their back). The small one got the other in position before he could notice what was going on. Not many people tried this move, with good reason. It was suicide if the person was heavier or faster. _The heavy one was slower but the small guy must be a lunatic!_ If that was not enough entertainment, the underdog got off his knees. Lee was in awe. A standing fireman's takedown. There are not many people who could pull that off. The underdog got his opponent pinned in seconds after and was met with applauds and cheers. The guy stood up and smiled at his teammates. It was non-other than Gaara. Lee turned and left before Gaara saw him. He did not want ruin his shining moment. Truth be told, Gaara wished Lee was there to see it.

The pool was unusually cold today which made it even colder when Lee got out of the pool. He was nearly in tears. All his fears had come true. He had disappointed Gai. The wise teacher told him to get some good rest and to come talk to him the morning. The good energy Lee had gained from watching Gaara with pride had all but vanished. He had walked back to the locker room in shame. He showered and got dressed by himself. He did not want the eyes of his teammates to rub in the stinging worry in his mind. Would Lee be able to get back to the top before the try-outs? He dragged his feet down the hall, heading back to the dorms to study and maybe he could get a decent job if he could not swim. He was half way the hall when he ran in to a mob of sweaty wrestlers.

"Do you guys have to be in the hall?" Lee said holding his nose. He was talking to Juugo, and old friend from high school who was on the team.

"There is no electrical plug in for the scales in the wrestling room," Juugo was not wrestling today but taking weights and measurements of those who made the team. "Sorry, 'bout the smell man!" Lee just waved and smiled goodbye. He was making his way through the hoard of bodies when he walked past one of the scales. He could not pass through the crowd because it was so thick with people trying to get a look at the guy who was on the scale. Lee cut to the opening around the scale, which the guys had given a wide berth for, to get around the crowd. Lee's hand was the first thing to make it to the edge of the mass. He popped out like a kernel. The coach was taking the weigh in personally.

"Sixty one point nine!" the coach announced. It was a light weight. Lee got around more of the crowd and saw him again. Gaara was on the scale in just his singlet. He had taken down the top half and folded it over like most of the guys. It had a striking effect on Gaara's new bod. His chest and arms were dripping with sweat and his cheeks were flushed. His neck length hair was damp and sticking to the side of neck. Lee was gawking again but this time he had good cause. It was a good thing that Lee was a firm believer in self-control or he might have jumped Gaara in all his Greek god glory. Gai said it was not very youthful to be so restrictive but that was the only thing they disagree on. Speaking of self-control, Lee now needed to get out of the crowd as quick as he could. Lee was deliberating a path when Gaara got off the scale. He saw Lee trying to get past a riled up, gang of wrestlers. Gaara walked up behind Lee. The crowd split and Lee started to walk through, thinking his threats of jujitsu had worked. The volume had toned down when Gaara passed Lee making sure to catch eye contact with him. There was a moment of reflection for Lee because Gaara had the same smile the day he told Lee that he would make it to the Olympics. Heat began to flow from Lee's toes to his heart. He knew there was one person that knew he would make it. Even if he did not think it was possible.

Lee made it to the dorms before Gaara. He did not want to run in to him again today. For some reason, the two guys could never find a way to not bump in to each other throughout the day. Lee was restless. He could not get his homework done. TV had nothing of interest on. He went down to the cafeteria, checking corners, making sure Gaara was not there. The cafeteria lady gave Lee the stink eye when he showed up to the buffet line wearing sunglasses. It's not that Lee did not want to be around Gaara, it was quite the opposite. But if Gaara was not ready for Lee to be his friend, he would wait forever, as long as it made Gaara happy. When Lee got back to his room, it was eight pm. He saw the business card on his desk. He picked it up and ran his thumb over the filigreed writing, feeling the bumps of each letter. _Buddy's._


	5. You're a superstar, at the gay bar

So, here is the lastest chapter. A little more exciting... Still some Sakura bashing but like I said before, that's the way the cookie crumbled. More to come in the future...

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto...

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It was Thursday night and Lee would not usually go out on school night but he did not want to have to explain himself to Kakashi. He was scared of the mysterious man. He did not have anything that was flamboyant, so he wore his white track suit. He knew where the place was because it was on the other side of the building the bistro was. It was in the basement of the complex and had a huge multi-coloured sign. He walked to the end of the block and then doubted his resolve. The thought of being trapped in his dorm room got him moving again. In five minutes he could see the front doors. It was ten feet away but Lee could not find a way to get his body to the front door. He had been standing there for about thirty seconds when a hand grabbed his and led him to the door. It was Kakashi and Iruka who had assisted the paralyzed man. They were no longer in sporting blazers and dress pants but tight jeans and tight shirts. Kakashi had a new, white scarf over his face and Iruka had let his shoulder length hair down. _These guys are not professors…_ Lee was in disbelief of the secret life of his sensei.

"I knew you'd come," Kakashi chided.

"How did you know that?" Lee asked.

"You have been needing a good night out for a while now," Iruka added, "It was written all over your face." Kakashi opened the door to the stairs that led down in to the club.

"Is that what you call flamboyant?" Kakashi scolded.

Gaara was dancing on the dance floor with no one in particular. His muscles were sore from wrestling this afternoon but that did not stop him from letting loose. He was a big fan of Adam Lambert and his song For Your Entertainment was blaring out of the speakers. Everyone was on the same rush of energy and the dance floor felt like heaven. Gaara skin was on fire as the sea of people moved in time. His mind was starting to find his calm. The song ended and Gaara thought it would be a good time to go to the booth everyone was at. Sasuke and his brother, Itachi were regulars and went to the university. Sasuke was going in to business and Itachi wanted to be a doctor. For some reason the thought of Itachi being able to wield a scalpel was not a comforting thought for Gaara. Naruto was here tonight, but he was not a regular. He had started to come when he and Sasuke started dating this summer. Gaara slid in to the booth and was not greeted. Itachi was on the hunt for his next prey, eyeing ever guy on the dance floor. Sasuke and Naruto were making out, oblivious to the world around him. Gaara took a sip from his beer.

"Still haven't found one?" Gaara asked the overly focused Itachi.

"Yes, but you won't fuck me…" Itachi turned to look at Gaara. Itachi was hell bent on owning Gaara's ass for the night at least once. Gaara had gotten in bed with Sasuke before he and Naruto had gotten together, but Gaara was scared of what Itachi was like between the sheets. For some reason, he thought of him like a praying mantis, he would eat his mate after having sex. Sasuke was a very passionate lover but there was no sparks flying when Gaara was with him. With Naruto, Sasuke was a different man. He was totally devoted to him. Gaara sighed when he looked at his watch. Kakashi was late again. The man had no conception of time and other people's need for it. He thought everyone's clock ran on Kakashi time. Gaara decided to go get the next round of drinks for everyone, seeing as they were all too busy to get it themselves. The bar was the first on your right when you came through the door. Gaara sat on the stool farthest from the door and ordered the drinks for his table. The bar tender looked at Gaara and asked for his ID. Gaara rolled his eyes and passed him his drivers. It was not like Gaara was not a regular but the bartender was newer and had not seen him that often. He was sloppy at pouring and half the drinks ended up on the bar. Gaara was in the process of glaring the bartender to death. Kakashi stepped through the stair way first followed by Iruka holding a nervous Lee's hand. Kakashi saw the red hair and sauntered over to the bar.

"Try not to kill the man who's pouring the drinks," Kakashi warned, "I haven't even got one yet!"

"You're late…" Gaara snapped. Kakashi gave him the evil eye.

"We had to rescue a stray," Kakashi said as he turned to Iruka and Lee. Gaara did not have a come-back for this one. Lee was just staring at the dance floor in disbelief. There were so many people. The music was so loud that Lee could feel every note in his chest. He had not even noticed that Gaara was sitting three feet from him. What Kakashi said earlier about what he should wear was not an understatement. The track suit stuck out like a crooked nail on a board.

"You brought him?" Gaara questioned the mischievous man.

"Oh, so you know each other after all," Kakashi looked between both men. Lee had finally come down to Earth to realize that there was an angry Gaara getting ready to kick his ass out the door. Lee took a step back, getting ready to excuse himself from the bar. Iruka put his arm through Lee's.

"He's our guest for the night," Iruka stated. Gaara was not impressed. This was his place to escape, not to run in to familiar faces. Gaara turned to the bar and picked up the drinks. He told Kakashi where the booth was and left. Iruka gave a sympathetic smile and offered to get a drink for Lee.

"Are you allowed to buy drinks for students?" Lee asked.

"Not if you're going to go home with them," Kakashi answered, "If you go home with my Ru-chan I will have to kill both of you…" Lee was starting to understand Kakashi's brand of humour. He smiled and gave an honest answer.

"I think we both know that I am not going home anyone tonight," Lee picked up the fruity drink that Kakashi had ordered for him and they all walked to the booth. The people at the club eyed Lee suspiciously, some with serious interest. They squeezed through the thick crowd and got to the privet booth. The first thing that caught Lee's attention was Sasuke Uchiha swapping saliva with Naruto Uzumaki. Lee even went as far as to stop, stare and point at the scene. Iruka lowered his hand and sat him down next to Itachi Uchiha. Itachi looked up and down the nervous boy and decided that he was not up the standard and continued to look through the dance floor. Lee breathed a sigh of relief. The man sitting next to him was scary but he was keeping to himself.

Kakashi was talking to Gaara about something that Lee could not hear over the music. Itachi was busy, Iruka was on the other side of the booth, too far away for a conversation, and the other two had not even surfaced to say hello. Lee just indulged himself in his drink. He had not had much experience with alcohol but this drink did not taste like it had a lot of alcohol in it. The red hue of the club was intoxicating. Lee was copping Itachi and stared out in to the dance floor. It was even more packed than the rest of the club. Lee kept his straw in his mouth for easy access. He was nearly done half his drink. His hands were feeling funny and his lips were going numb but he did not mind. Iruka looked over at Lee several times, every few minutes. Every time he looked at Lee his perfect posture was getting worse and his face was getting closer to his drink. Iruka was worried. He wondered if the poor boy had ever had alcohol.

The music was slowing down and Lee was getting to the bottom of his drink. Itachi was even starting to worry about the guy. He was starting to look like a kid high on sugar, all excited. Plus he was getting a little too attached to his drink. The only people that were not noticing Lee's reaction to booze, besides Sasuke and Naruto, was Kakashi and Gaara. They had gotten in to a discussion about modern literature.

"Ma-ma, Gaara-san, it's not like I don't enjoy our little conversations," Kakashi interrupted Gaara, "But there are more pressing matters at hand…" He pointed at a sloppy, drunk Lee. Gaara raised an invisible eyebrow.

"What did you give him?" Gaara asked. Kakashi had a habit of trying to make the night fun with chemicals whether you liked it or not.

"Nothing," Kakashi said with surprise, "It's just a pornstar… Nothing you wouldn't swallow." Kakashi grinned at Gaara and he just glared back. The next song came on and it was a catchy electronic song. Lee did not notice what it was but liked it. He got a good idea. Before anyone could stop him, Lee had jumped up and got a hold of Gaara. No one knew what to do. Even Sasuke and Naruto had come to the surface to see what the commotion was. Lee had Gaara by the hand and was standing over Iruka and Kakashi. He looked directly at Gaara, or the best he could while swaying.

"You… Me… Dance…" Lee said. His speech was not slurring but you could tell he was past three sheets to the wind… He was a tarp in a tornado. Gaara just nodded and stepped over Kakashi and Iruka. Lee was leading him in the wrong direction and had to steer a couple times. Kakashi just smiled to himself. Iruka had caught that smile.

"Did you do something Kakashi?" Iruka knew his Kakashi and knew that this had to be part of a master plan.

"No, Iruka I have been good!" Kakashi put his hands up in defense, "You can even search me for illicit substances officer." Kakashi still had his hands in the air and a come hither look in his eyes. Iruka just rolled his eyes and gave the white haired man a look. Kakashi looked at everyone and the table and made sure everyone was preoccupied. He pulled his scarf down and kissed the exposed side of Iruka's neck while he was keeping an eye on the couple on the dance floor. Iruka whipped around. Kakashi never kissed Iruka in public, groping yes, but he never takes his mask off. Iruka gave Kakashi a smile and then a kiss.

Gaara had immediately gotten in to the rhythm but Lee was completely off beat. I was obvious he had never danced a day in his life. People were staring at him and some were snickering. Lee noticed and slowed down his frantic rhythm. He eventually just stopped and started looking for a way back to the booth. As Lee was turning away, Gaara seized his hips. Lee was in shock. Gaara pulled them together and began to move to the music. By Gaara moving his body and the closeness, Lee was moving along with Gaara. Lee hand his mouth hanging open and his eyes on Gaara. His body was keeping him in disbelief. The way he moved was like nothing Lee had ever seen. He could not believe that the man who was the star of the wrestling practice today was currently making Lee move involuntarily. Gaara wrapped his hand around Lee's waist and leaned his head back. His neck was stretched and open. Lee was tempted to kiss it, but only got as far as leaning in to Gaara. The two locked eyes and Gaara took the lead. He grinded in to Lee's mid-section, made him jump back for a second. It was not like he could go far in the sea of bodies. Gaara just kept up with him, like they were in a tango. Lee relaxed in to the rhythm and began to enjoy this type of dancing. His mind was not all there at the moment but he knew that this was something he could potentially regret tomorrow. He did not care right now, he had Gaara so close to him and he would not let this moment go for the whole world. Gaara brought them in even closer if it was possible, their noses almost touching. Lee was starting to sweat and touched his zipper. Gaara took over and undid his track sweater. The sweater was lost on the dance floor. Neither of the boys was sober enough to keep track of it and they were distracted. Lee had his usual t-shirt, only this time it was not green but white to match his track suit of the day. Once the sweater was off, Gaara's eyes lit up at the sight of Lee's muscles. Lee put his arms around Gaara's neck and gave a droopy smile. Gaara had to smile back. Lee was just too cute.

They danced like this for a while until a slower song that Lee did not like came on.

"I don't want to dance," said Lee, "I want to go sit down!"

"Ok," Gaara yelled over the music, "I just gotta take a piss. I meet you by the bar, ok?" Lee nodded. He knew where the bar was. They got off the dance floor and Lee went left to the bar and Gaara went right to the toilets. Lee had gotten to the bar, and after some struggle, he got on to one of the bar stools. The bartender walked up to Lee and gave him a look that said what the hell do you want?

"Can I have one of those drinks you gave me before?" Lee was not sure what Kakashi had ordered for him. Thank god the bartender had a memory like an elephant despite his horrible bartending skills. He mixed the drink and put it on the bar. Lee reached in his pant pocket and pulled out the money he owed. He started to sip on the drink when Gaara showed up. Gaara took the drink from Lee and glared at the bartender.

"Troublesome…" the bartender mumbled. Gaara escorted Lee back to the booth, drinking the pornstar before he got to there. He did not want Iruka blowing a fuse over either of them drinking too much. He left the empty glass on a table that had been recently vacated and had lots of empties on it. He got to the table and set Lee down next to Iruka and then had everyone move over. He did not want a drunk, vulnerable man next to Itachi. Lee's hair was everywhere and his shirt definitely gave him more sex appeal than the track sweater. Kakashi was grinning at the pair but both were too drunk to notice. The drink Gaara downed had pushed him past tipsy/drunk to drunk. He had few drinks earlier but he was not planning to drink more than that. Iruka gave them the stink eye. He was wondering if it was bed time for the two party animals. He whispered in to Kakashi's ear, expressing his concern. Kakashi agreed and they started to shuffle the two boys out of the booth. Lee dramatically and loudly waved good bye to everyone in the booth.

"Sasuke! I never knew you were gay!" Lee nearly yelled causing everyone in the group roll their eyes. Sasuke just smirked.

"Do you really think I want to marry Sakura?" Sasuke snuffed. Lee smiled back, he knew that Sakura was not a nice person and would need to work out some issues before she met her knight in shining armour. Iruka pulled Lee by the shirt and got him to the stairs to the doors. Kakashi was laughing with Gaara when they got outside. Gaara lit up a smoke. Lee swiped it and threw it on the ground. Lee was swaying and glaring at Gaara but no one could top the malevolent look on Gaara's face.

"Can't 'moke no more!" Lee yelled at Gaara, "You are athlete now." Gaara was no in a state of shock. Someone actually took a smoke from his mouth. Kakashi was looking on the scene with a smirk. Iruka was worried that Gaara might actually hurt Lee. Gaara just shook his head and lit another. Lee tried to grab this one to but Kakashi caught him before he could fall over. Kakashi got Lee's arm over his shoulders. They walked towards the university, talking amongst themselves, laughing when Lee tried to join the conversation. He was not getting any better with fresh air.

By the time they got to Lee's dorm he was not looking too good. He was having a hard time walking and talking. There was nothing coming out of his mouth that made sense. Iruka thought he might be allergic to alcohol. They all helped Lee to his bed once they managed to the door open. There was no one in the room.

"Where is your roommate?" Gaara asked while taking off his shoes. Lee had spread out over the bed. His body open in all of its glory. Iruka slapped the back of Gaara's head.

"He's drunk!" Iruka whispered. Gaara's cheeks flushed at getting caught drooling.

"I did not get one… My last roommate graduated and they did not give me one this semester," Lee shouted. He just stayed lying down. Gaara did not want to leave him alone this drunk and Iruka was having the same thought.

"Should I stay?" he asked the two older men, "He doesn't look so hot."

"That's not what your dirty mind's telling me…" Kakashi smiled. He usually had to read dirty books to get this much entertainment. "Yes, defiantly. Stay but keep your hands off him. You do not want to scare the poor bastard." Gaara nodded and the two older men left. Iruka was trying to get his word in before they left but Kakashi had grabbed his ass making him scoot in to the hall. Iruka was about to yell at Kakashi for his lack of judgement.

"Ma-ma, Ru-chan…They won't do anything we won't," Kakashi smiled at Iruka, who was giving his disappointed teacher glare. He crossed his arms and waited for an explanation. "Those to have so much sexual tension, I was tempted to rob their clothes and leave them to fuck. But I am merciful and just left them fully clothed and only one of them is black out drunk." Iruka was going red with anger. He was never happy when Kakashi was right but this was about two students and Kakashi had crossed a line. He was about to skin Kakashi's ass with a scolding, when Kakashi pinned Iruka to the wall. Pressing their hips as close as he could, he kissed Iruka. "See nothing we wouldn't do…" Kakashi kissed his lips once more and began to walk away. Iruka was struggling for self-control. Kakashi's ass was swinging back and forth as he walked to the elevator. It was too much, Iruka's pants were telling him to jump the man and his mind said he needed to win the fight. He walked up to the elevator doors and waited next to Kakashi. They did not say a thing to each other. The light above the door went out and a ding signalled the elevator door opening. Kakashi walked in first and Iruka could not take it anymore. All Kakashi knew as one minute he was on his feet the next he was off them, legs wrapped around Iruka's waist. His back was against the wall and Iruka's lips on his. Kakashi smiled.

"Ru-chan… what if the students see us?" Kakashi said sarcastically. Iruka reached behind him and pressed the emergency stop button, making the elevator stop its descent.


	6. Get up and shake the glitter off

So, this is a shorter chapter to keep you all happy untill I can spend some much needed time and dediction to this one. Again, Sakura is not depicted in the greatest of light but I have plans for her to redeem herself. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

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Lee had never been to hell but he felt like he stuck his head in the oven that is Satan's domain. The early morning light was peeking out the one window in his dorm. _How did I get home?_ Lee looked to his left and saw a red head curled up in the empty bed next to his. Gaara had curled up in the spare bed. He had tried to stay up and keep an eye on Lee but he fell asleep once Lee had finished hurling up all of his stomach's contents. There was a buzzing sound and Lee was scared to sit up. He didn't know if he was going to be sick again. Gaara had no blanket so Lee sat up slowly to get him the one at the end of his bed. Lee still had his clothes from last night on. His legs swung over the side of the bed. He rolled his shoulders in attempt to avoid pain his head from being upright. Slowly, his feet touched the floor and he paddled his way to the end of his bed. The blanket was a gift from his grandmother. It had ninja fish all over it. I made Lee smile everytime he looked at it. He covered the boy who was curled in to the shape of a ball. The act of bending down ever so slightly, made Lee nauseous again. He was not going to spontaneously project vomit but it was a need that was top on his list of priorities. He got to the bathroom and flicked the light on. The brightness nearly crippled him. He managed to get used to the light and looked in the mirror. His bowl cut was now standing straight up and the white shirt he had on, was not so white anymore. There were dark circles under his eyes and he was pale. Lee's reflection was enough to finally push his nausea over the edge.

Once Lee was done brushing his teeth, he walked out of the bathroom to find Gaara awake. Lee just waved because he was not going to risk opening his mouth. He had cleaned himself up and looked a little better. Gaara was smiling and stretching. He was pro when it comes to hangovers.

"What time is it?" Lee asked with a husky voice.

"About eight," Gaara replied while looking for his shoes. Lee jumped up and was about to run out when his headache pushed him back on to the bed. He sat with his head in his hands. Gaara had found one of two shoes.

"I need to get to class," Lee muttered, "I have class in half an hour…" Gaara looked up from tying the second shoe in place.

"You want to go sit in a desk now?" Gaara sat up and looked at the hurting Lee, "Common, If you feel better by the afternoon you can go to your classes. For now, let's get some food." Lee gaged at the thought of food or anything going up or down his throat. "You'll feel better after food, water and some good coffee." Lee looked up to see Gaara standing over him, extending a hand. Lee stood up and went to his dresser to change his shirt, walking past Gaara. Gaara looked just as good as he did last night. His hair was messy to begin with and his clothes did not look wrinkled at all. Lee was jealous. The white shirt was pulled off Lee's frame and discarded in the hamper he kept next to the dresser. Gaara had tried not to look but there was nothing that could keep his eyes from wandering. He sat down on the bad and tried to look at the wall. Lee was bent over a drawer looking at which shirt he would put on. It wasn't like Lee had a lot of variety but Gaara did not mind that it took him a few extra seconds to pick out a dark green t-shirt and a black track suit.

Sunglasses and Lee did not mix. Gaara though it was cute. He looked like a cheap bodyguard. Gaara smile at the thought of Lee being his bodyguard. Gaara's sunglasses were aviators, and in Lee's opinion looked much hotter than his. The rock star look worked very well for Gaara. Lee's were dollar store sports styled sunglasses. It looked like the matrix sunglasses on an Olympic athlete. They decided that the bistro would be a better option that the cafeteria. Mystery meat and undercooked scrambled eggs did not sound like a good idea. They had the same waiter that Gaara and Tsunade had last time they had been here. Gaara asked for a table on the patio and Lee glared at him. Lee was not the glaring type but he was in a lot of pain and someone wanted to extend that pain by making him sit in the sun. Gaara had ordered the breakfast platter, and told the waiter they were both having the same. Lee was going to object but the waiter had already left.

"I'm not supposed to eat bacon or sausage or pancake syrup," Lee scolded Gaara, "I am supposed to have oatmeal in the morning or Gai will be disappointed. I'm supposed to eat healthy so my body will stay youthful," Gaara took a big sip of his black coffee before giving his defence.

"Don't worry about not supposed to," Gaara started to put some sugar in his coffee, "It will help with the hang over I promise. Have some coffee," Lee was not a big coffee drinker, but when he did, he doused it in sugar and cream. Once he had practically made a latte out of six sugar packets and four creamers, he could hear the distinct voice of Iruka. He looked over his shoulder and he could see Iruka walking in hand with Kakashi down the side walk. They both had huge smiles on their faces. Lee was wondering if they might have won the lottery or something. Gaara just smiled behind his coffee cup, knowing what the two trouble makers probably got themselves in to last night. Kakashi dragged Iruka to the hedge, on the other side of where the two younger men sat.

"Yo! My two favourite, young lovers!" Kakashi announced, "How was your night?" Lee was sinking in to the wicker chair, as far as it would allow. Gaara just glared at Kakashi for making Lee nervous. Iruka elbowed Kakashi and gave him the 'behave' look.

"Lee was sick for most of it," Gaara replied, "How is your ass feeling? Iruka looks like he had a good time," Kakashi continued to smile even though the comment was designed to make him uncomfortable but Iruka was staring slack jawed at Gaara. It took a few seconds before Lee caught on to what the conversation was actually about. He began to look from Kakashi's face to Gaara's and back again. The silence was interrupted by loud shouting coming from down the street. Everyone leaned over to get a look at was causing the commotion. Sasuke was running full tilt down the street. He was running from something but they could not see who it was. Iruka and Kakashi leaned in to the hedge trying not to get hit by the speeding man. As soon as the black haired man ran past, he was followed by a pink haired woman and after her was a Naruto.

"BAKAYARU! I will kill you! You said you didn't want it cause you saving it for marriage! You lying ass TEME!" Sakura yelled. Lee felt sorry for Sasuke, he knew that she could sprint two hours a day, non-stop. Naruto was not that bad himself but Lee had never seen Sasuke in the gym even once.

"Sakura-chan! Don't hurt him! He was going to tell you!" Naruto pleaded, "He just doesn't like you that way!" Sakura stopped and Naruto nearly hit her trying to stop. They had stopped ten feet away from their on looking crowd. Sakura slapped Naruto.

"You are the reason he turned this way!" Sakura started to cry, "All I wanted was a perfect life for me and Sasuke and you ruined it!" She was starting to fall to her knees as she bawled. Lee felt sorry for her. He jumped up, ignoring his headache. He hopped over the hedge and went to Sakura's side. He touched her shoulder to comfort her, and she whipped around like a snake.

"You stay away too!" she hissed at Lee, "You're just like them!" She started to cry even harder and took off running in the direction they came from. Everyone stood still in shock. Lee knew that Sakura had known he was gay but this was the first time she had been truly cruel about it. Lee only meant well. He did not want to see anyone that upset. Sasuke and Naruto were still trying to catch their breath. It was only after the excitement had died down, Gaara noticed that Naruto was not wearing a shirt, only jeans and Sasuke was in his underwear.

"Are you ok?" Lee asked the two guys. They nodded but did not look at each other.

"She came home early this morning…" Sasuke started, "She said that her flight was delayed and she was going to be here at noon. She walked in on us…" Naruto was starting to walk towards Sasuke but he just walked past Naruto and in the direction of his apartment. "I have to go make sure she has not burned down the building." Naruto was left standing in the street. Lee took off his jacket and handed it Naruto. He did not notice the gesture at first but then took it in his arms.

"Did you want to come have breakfast with us?" Lee suggested to Naruto. He looked at the patio and the only people still staring were Gaara, Kakashi and Iruka. Naruto swung the jacket over his shoulders and put his arms in the sleeves. Once the jacket was on, he nodded and led the way to the front entrance.

By the time that Naruto and Lee got the table, Iruka and Kakashi were nowhere to be found. The waiter brought another cup of coffee and extra utensils. Naruto had a sad look on his face. Gaara was thinking that was lucky it was not him that got caught with Sasuke but he did feel for Naruto had what he was going through. It was not until today that Gaara found out that Sasuke had been dating Sakura.

"Where did Kakashi and Iruka go?" Lee liked Iruka but had not made up his mind about Kakashi. He respected him as a teacher but he was too eccentric for Lee.

"They had a meeting and classes to teach," Gaara sighed. He looked over to the glum looking Naruto, "Don't worry. Sasuke just needs time to process this." Naruto put his chin on his arms that were folded over the table. Lee thought he should give the track suit to Naruto as a gift. The orange stripes on the arms and sides really suited him.

"I hope so…" Naruto piped up, "I don't think I would handle it well if he broke up with me…" He sat back up and began to fix his coffee. "He really was going to tell her, he just did not want something like that to happen." Naruto pointed out in to the street where scene had taken place. The waiter appeared at the table side with three large plates of eggs, bacon, sausage and a small stack of pancakes smothered in syrup.

"Now, this is what I call a breakfast!" Gaara snatched up his fork and dug in.

"Believe it!" Naruto made the same gesture and started to inhale his food. Lee was not as enthusiastic, but once he realized his stomach was stable enough for solid food, he too began to indulge in an unusually good meal.

"Are you guys like…?" Naruto took a break from shovelling food, "I am not interrupting something am I?" Naruto asked cautiously. Gaara and Lee looked at each other from across the table. There were sparks last night but still nothing to warrant a date or interruption. They shook their heads and slowly looked at Naruto who was sitting next to them.

"No, not at all," they said in unison. Naruto kept looking between the two suspiciously. He was a little slow but he was not stupid. Gaara has had the hots for Lee for a year now, Naruto knew that. And he also knew that Lee was one umbrella garnished drink away from coming out of the closet. Something was not adding up. If Naruto knew Gaara, they would have already done it by now. Something was holding them back.

* * *

I'll try and have something finished by the end of the week. Bye!


	7. Some say love is not for sinners

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto

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Breakfast came to a close and they all went their separate ways. Lee had to go meet with Gai. Naruto had to find out if Sasuke was still alive and if he was, were they still together. Gaara was content to go to his dorm and have a nap. He was tired form watching Lee all night and he also needed a shower. Lee had gotten to the fitness building and was already regretting the large breakfast. Gai would skin him live for eating such unhealthy food, not to mention he was hungover. Lee knocked on the door with the name plate 'Maito Gai'. A booming voice told Lee to come in. He slid in the small office. There was a desk with two chairs in front of it and a large man in a track suit on the other side. Gai was sorting through papers. Lee took a seat in one of the two chairs. He sat on the edge of the chair, not wanting to get too comfortable. The papers hit the desk and Gai sighed at Lee.

"Lee, I know that the last few months have been tough for you," Gai started, "But it is not very youthful to bottle your emotions. You need to find something, other than sports to keep the fountain of youth inside you flowing!" Gai smiled to encourage his student, "Why don't you go out with friends tonight? You can go to the movies or something?" Lee smiled and nodded.

"I went out with friends last night! It was very exciting and youthful!" Lee said.

"Very good! I will see you tonight at practice," Gai saluted his student. Lee felt a little better that people were agreeing on advice for him. They all thought that Lee needed to blow off steam as well as staying focused. Not just practice till he couldn't stand.

Gaara had gone to his classes in the afternoon. He walked out of his 'advanced critiques of writing' and made his way to the fitness center for wrestling practice. He was glad he had gotten in to the club. It have him something to work towards. Once he was changed and laced up, they started with running the building by going to one end and back around the outside and back through the back doors. While touring the mundane circle, Gaara's thoughts came back to Lee at the club last night, Lee's body moving under the white fabric of the t-shirt and his hips swaying to the beat that Gaara provided. Gaara had finished his rounds with a group of three others who were done five minutes before everyone else. The thoughts still circled in Gaara's head. They all piled in to the wrestling room for sparing. Gaara's partner was taller than him but much skinnier. Gaara stayed low to the ground and it was a piece of cake to pin him. He got four pins in before they switched partners. The guy Gaara was paired with was called Sai. He had been in his geometry class last semester. The black hair reminded him of Lee. Gaara was sunk. He could not concentrate now the thought of Lee was at the front of his mind. Juugo noticed the difficulties the Gaara was having and volunteered to help them spar. There was really nothing that helped. This pattern continued throughout the rest of the practice. Everyone packed it in to leave but Gaara stayed behind to practice more. Mr. Akimichi, Chouji's father, asked Gaara if everything was ok. Gaara told him he was having an off day and just needed to work it off. Mr. Akimichi admired his dedication. The first thing Gaara went to work on was his shooting, sliding down on to one knee to enter your opponent's center of gravity.

Lee's practice was much better. He had reached one of his old records and his headache was almost gone. The mood in the locker room was much lighter. Gai held Lee back to congratulate him on his youthful return. The hall was dark due to the hour. It was getting to be eight pm and Lee was starting to feel the fatigue. He turned down the hall where the wrestling room was located but the light was on in the padded room. The practice should have ended an hour ago. There weren't any tournaments coming up, so no one would be staying late to drop weight. Lee poked his head in the door and found Gaara, sweaty and exhausted. He entered the room to see what had caused the man to stay long after everyone had gone home. Gaara had done down the length of the room and turned to lunge his way towards Lee. He stopped when he saw Lee standing at the door, on the edge of the mat.

"Hey…" Gaara said breathless, "How was practice?" Lee was concerned by Gaara's overenthusiasm.

"Better," Lee nodded, "I am almost up to par." Gaara smiled. It eased Lee's worry a little bit, "What keeps you here so late?" Gaara looked at his shoes then back up to Lee.

"Just getting some extra practice in…" Gaara replied. Lee nodded sternly and started to remove his shoes. Gaara stood in shock, "What are you doing?" Gaara was not expecting to get on the mat with the guy had a mad crush on.

"I was on the wrestling team in high school," Lee explained, "I might be a little rusty but I can still pin you if I wanted." Gaara scoffed. Lee was uttering a threat him might not be able to back.

"Well see about that…" Gaara walked to the white circle in the middle of the room. Lee unzipped his jacket and jogged to the middle of the circle. They got down in to position and once the room was still, they both moved like lightening. Gaara shot for Lee's right leg and Lee shot his legs out in a perfect sprawl. Gaara let the leg go and struggled to get in a position to do a fireman's. Lee knew this was going to happen so he hooked his arm around Gaara's to keep him from moving under him. If Gaara were to get a fireman's set up, Lee would be sunk. Gaara lifted up to get them in to standing position. Lee only had socks on and there was a certain disadvantage. Once they were standing in a lock, Gaara moved his hands to wrap around Lee. Gaara locked his fists together and began to squeeze Lee's ribs. Lee became a little more docile and Gaara took him down over his knee. Gaara executed the takedown perfectly. Lee knew this was the end and let his body hit the floor with a thud. He started to laugh and Gaara let him go. They both lay on the mats laughing.

"You're the only one who knew that sprawling and then the chicken wig was my kryptonite…" Gaara laughed. Lee turned his head to smile back at Gaara.

"I still lost…" Lee admitted. Gaara sat up to start untying his shoes and take off the knee guards.

"But you put up a good fight," Gaara commented. He had gotten one shoe off. Lee propped himself on his elbows. Gaara looked over his shoulder to look at the sculpted god. The green shirt Lee was wearing was the same all his others, in other words, Gaara could see every muscle. He had to keep his focus on the shoe to keep from looking over at the man. Lee noticed his tension. He put his hand on Gaara's arm. He turned to face Lee.

"Is everything ok?" Lee asked. He knew that Gaara had improved tremendously but it would never completely erase the past.

"Just had a bad practice…" Gaara shrugged. Lee knew how that felt.

"Can talk to me if you need," Lee offered.

"I think that we established that we need to keep our distance…" Gaara said in to his lap. Lee knew that was a flimsy excuse. That was four months ago and before both of them had time to think.

"I can keep my distance," Lee started, "But would it really make either of us happy?" Lee had just experienced what holding in emotions can do to his youthful spirit. It would not be fair to either of them to deny that they liked to be with each other.

"I still don't know if could be just friends…"Gaara had not managed to look up to Lee, "If you were to—" Lee had taken Gaara's chin in his hand and pulled his lips to Lee's. There was a fluttering in the bottom of Lee's stomach making the kiss feel right. Gaara was shocked at first but soon melted in to Lee's kiss. They stayed there for a few seconds then Lee broke the kiss, but holding his face close to Gaara's. Lee opened his eyes but Gaara had not come back down to Earth yet. He took his hand on Gaara's chin and laid it across his cheek. Gaara exhaled and opened his eyes. He was still looking at the floor despite Lee's gentle touch.

"I am moody, irritable, I have an addictive personality and I cannot guarantee my mental stability," Gaara whispered. The last thing he wanted was Lee to fall for him then find out that Gaara came with baggage. Lee lightly pecked Gaara's lips and smiled.

"I think I've proven I can take it," Lee whispered back. Gaara's heart flew through the ceiling. He never got what he wanted and now he was sitting next to Gaara, telling him there would be nothing that Gaara could do to scare him. After a suicide attempt, what could be worse? Lee stood up and extended a hand to Gaara. They both walked out of the wrestling room holding their gym bags.

"I'll wait for you at the bench by the doors," Lee told Gaara as he looked back. Gaara was locking up the doors and turning off lights. He headed for the locker room to change out of the sweaty set of shorts and t-shirt. He began to think about how Lee was so perfect. His body and how kind he was. Gaara could not get his heart to stop racing.

Gaara finished up in the locker room and went out to meet Lee by the double doors that lead to the main court of the university. When Gaara finally got to Lee, there was a moment of awkward apprehension. Do they kiss or hold hands? They had a moment of leaning in and out until they just decided to walk out the door. The air was cool, making Gaara shiver. He just had his t-shirt he had worn to his afternoon classes on and his hair was wet from his quick shower. Lee took off his track jacket and put it over Gaara's shoulders. He looked up and Lee with a stunned expression. Lee just smiled and continued to walk next to Gaara.

Lee walked Gaara to his dorm and was ready to go back to his own. Gaara invited him in and they ended up talking for two hours while watching dry sit coms. They talked about Gaara and his family. His sister Temari was coming to Nagoya for the weekend next week. Gaara's brother, Kankuro was still in Germany, trying to sell the last of his father's company and estate. Lee talked about his home town and his parents. They were relatively normal. They only whished the best for him and worked hard to put him through university and supported him in his swimming. He came from a small town and he never got the opportunity to really get out and experience the world. Lee also admitted that he had come out to his parents.

"How did they take it?" Gaara asked.

"My mom was ok with it but my dad took a few days before he accepted it," Lee was actually quite proud of his parents and their support.

"My dad nearly disowned me…" Gaara added.

"Why would he do that?" Lee questioned. He would never understand why people would do things like that. Then he remembered Sakura today and her comment.

"Because for some reason, being gay was suddenly worse that drinking and doing drugs," Gaara was able to keep eye contact, even though he wanted to look at the floor, "When I was an addict, he could ignore it. Once I was gay, it was right in his fucking face." Lee wanted to hold Gaara's hand but opted for letting him finish before Lee would get all touchy feely. "Then he died of an aneurism two weeks later. The ugly bastard got what he deserved." Gaara had to look at the floor to deliver that sentence. Lee decided that this was the time to take Gaara's hand in his. Gaara looked up just in time for Chouji to walk in. The three sat still for a few seconds then Lee stood up quickly followed by a hesitant Gaara. Lee waved at Chouji.

"Hello, I'm Lee," he smiled, "I don't think we have been introduced." Chouji nodded.

"I'm Chouji…" he replied quietly. He had been the one to help spread the rumour four months ago and did think Lee would be so nice to him. Lee turned to Gaara.

"I think I should get going," Lee pointed at the door way and Gaara just nodded in agreement. Chouji walked past the two and sat on his bed. Gaara escorted Lee out of the dorm. Once Lee got to the door frame, he turned and gave a kiss to an unsuspecting Gaara. He knew that there would be real rumours flying tomorrow, so he thought that they better have some evidence. Gaara broke the kiss and quickly looked behind him at a slack jawed Chouji. Gaara realized what had happened and kissed Lee passionately. Gaara bit Lee's lip to get him to open his mouth but Lee just broke the kiss and waved goodbye. He started to walk down the hall and realized the elevators there in the other direction making him turn around and go the other way. Gaara smiled at a disoriented Lee. Things were going to change around here. No more lies and no more rumours.

* * *

Another short one but It is coming along...


	8. Situations are irrelevant now

I think this fic is destined to be chiped at, piece by piece. Well, here is the next short chapter. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto

* * *

The next week would be nothing but a snow storm of awkward meetings and rushed hellos. Lee was officially marked as the gay guy who's on the swim team. Gai and the rest of the team took it well. They didn't applaud but they didn't condemn him either. He had managed to reconnect with Neji but he was nervous to give him too much information in case his motives were not well placed. Sasuke and Naruto were on the fritz and Naruto would hang out with Lee and Gaara to take up his time but they could tell there was somewhere else that he'd rather be. Despite Naruto's clingy attitude to them, Lee and Gaara got to spend more and more time alone together. Gaara knew Lee was not going to just hop in the sack and that wasn't what Gaara wanted either. But Lee's general lack of knowledge was getting frustrating. He didn't know where to put his hands and if that wasn't the case, he didn't know where to put his tongue during a kiss. Gaara was being as patient as possible. Well, as patient as a young, horny guy could be. Lee could sense his frustration and really did not know where to turn for advice.

By the time Thursday rolled around, Lee and Gaara were sitting in Kakashi's lit. class, Kakashi was going in to detail why people go to extremes to protect the ones we love and why sometimes, people can do the most cruel things to them. There was an easy cadence to Kakashi's voice that had most of the class sleeping. Lee suddenly got the best idea. He could ask Kakashi. He was a self-taught expert on the subject. After everyone had left the room, before Iruka had come to join Kakashi for lunch, Lee was going to ask the sensei for advice. Lee told Gaara to go on ahead without him and that he would see him later that day. Lee approached the front of the auditorium where Kakashi was collecting his books. He waited and made sure that he and Kakashi would be alone for this conversation.

"Lee-kun, if there is something you need to say, it is best if you just spit it out," Kakashi said without having to stop packing his messenger bag. Lee was not aware that Kakashi had noticed his presence.

"Um, I need advice Hatake-sensei…" Lee fidgeted with the zipper on his track suit.

"Kakashi, I don't like being called Hatake," Kakashi replied while facing Lee for what might be a lengthy conversation, "It makes me feel old. Speaking of feeling old, what was it that you needed advice for?" Lee just stared at the old, brown carpet of the auditorium.

"Well, I was wondering— no, I thought you could tell me if…" Lee stammered, "Is there any advice for…Guys— I mean men w-who are, um, you know—"

"Ever heard of porn Lee?" Kakashi stopped the painful rambling. Lee stared at his professor with wide eyes, "You can learn a lot from watching porn, hell, even reading it." Lee opened and closed his mouth, and then gave a really confused look.

"I have never, um… watched that, um…" Lee was really in to foreign territory now.

"Well, I suggest you go on your computer tonight," Kakashi started, "And look up porn and see what comes up, ok?" Lee put his finger in the air to signal that he had something to say, even though his mouth was not working.

"I don't have my own computer," Lee put a stop to that idea, "My parents didn't have the money to afford a computer and sending me to school." Iruka walked in the class and Kakashi started to walk towards him.

"I'm sorry, Lee," he shrugged, "there is nothing I can do to help." Lee sighed, all that effort to end up where he started.

He got to his dorm an hour later. Lee had gotten to the doors of the sex shop and could not get the courage to walk in. He decided that maybe getting a magazine from the bookstore might be less intimating. Lee got to the back section, looked at all the choices for gay porn and ran out of the store, petrified that someone saw him looming over the dirty mags. He got closer to his door he saw a small package wrapped in bright coloured paper. He picked it up and read the oversized card on the front.

_Tanjoubiha_

_Omedetogozaiimasu!_

_(Happy Birthday)_

Lee's birthday was in two months, it was unusual to get presents this early. He opened the card to see a poorly written note.

_Dear Lee, _

_I could not have given you these with Iruka watching. He might have actually killed me. They are for your viewing pleasure. But as far as information goes, I ever gave you this. Good luck!_

_Sincerely Kakashi._

_P.S. burn this card after reading._

Lee unlocked the doors and entered his room. The room was nice and quiet, perfect for opening a present. He sat down at his desk and ripped the corner off the bundle. There were two books and one video. They were all of, what seemed to Lee, standard editions of man-on-man erotica. Lee looked at his wrist watch. There was four hours till his next class. He figured that would be a sufficient time frame. The DVD was placed in the tray and Lee pulled out a pen and note pad.

Gaara was stressing over his sister coming in to town this weekend. She was going to be here for supper on Friday night, and then she wanted to go dancing with the guys. For some reason, she and Iruka got along really well. It wasn't the guys Gaara was worried about; it was _the_ guy Gaara was worried about. Temari would be meeting Lee as his boyfriend and not just the nice guy who helped him to the hospital. He did not know why he was panicked over it. Lee was a very respectable guy and they agreed that Lee was not to, not under any circumstances, drink. That still did not put Gaara's mind at ease. And his anxiety was not helped when Lee flew past Gaara when he was heading in to the locker room after practice. He yelled something about studying and took off around the corner like had committed a crime and was running from the cops.

On Friday morning, Gaara managed to pin Lee in to a corner in the cafeteria. Lee said he had a paper due this afternoon and took off running, promising to be at the supper tonight. Gaara knew, for a fact, that the only class Lee had writing as a given was the lit. class they shared, and Kakashi had not assigned any essays. There was definitely something wrong and Lee was not telling him. Gaara could not focus on anything the whole day. What was causing Lee's unusual behaviour? Gaara's last class was over at three thirty. He got to his dorm at four and he was ready to go to supper by four thirty. The small dorm room was not enough room to pace around in, so Gaara decided to go see what was bugging Lee.

He knocked on the door of Lee's room. There weren't any noises or movement behind the door. The second knock came with someone falling from the bed and scrabbling to the door. Lee opened the door breathless and holding a remote. If Gaara had eyebrows, one would be touching the ceiling.

"Hello stranger," Gaara greeted. There were two books face down on his bed. Gaara leaned over to get a better look. Lee moved with Gaara's eyes, using his body as a human curtain.

"Um, hey, I thought Temari wasn't in town until six," Lee said while scratching the back of his head. Lee tried to smile but the glare on Gaara's face was causing a puppy somewhere in the world to go to heaven.

"Lee, what is going on?" Gaara questioned. Lee fidgeted with his jacket again. Gaara got frustrated and blasted past Lee to see what was being kept a secret. Lee tried to get a head of Gaara but the shorter man ducked and dived around Lee. Gaara was trying to looking the bathroom and closets and had not even noticed the TV screen. Lee noticed this and quickly pointed the remote at the machine, turning the screen black. He hoped that Gaara didn't notice what had been on the TV. The screen blinked and the power went off. Gaara whipped around like he was Sherlock Homes himself. Gaara had come to the conclusion there wasn't anyone else in the room but there might have been something else causing Lee's anxiety. Lee was in the process of closing the door when Gaara picked up one of the books. Lee dived to grab the book but Gaara just moved out of his path and stole the remote out of Lee's hand. Gaara pointed the remote at the TV and the screen lit up. There, plain as day, the menu of a porno. Lee pushed all the buttons at the same time, and somehow turned it off. Lee did not even bother to turn around. He was so humiliated. Gaara flipped through the book and nodded.

"This is your big secret…?" Gaara asked, half laughing, "If you wanted a better variety, I could have lent you some," Gaara picked up the second book and read the synopsis on the back.

"I was… um, getting ide— no, information for ah…" he explained. Lee had managed to turn around but his chin was buried in his chest, "well, you seem to know a lot and I'm not as… I just noticed that you were angry at me sometimes… When I don't know what to do…" Gaara was suddenly guilty. He had made Lee feel like he wasn't experienced enough and that he had to change in order to become the person Gaara wanted.

"I was never mad at you," Gaara said, "I was frustrated. But that is because I haven't gotten laid in months… I would never want you to feel bad about yourself. I like you just the way you are," Gaara got up from the bed and approached Lee. He leaned in to kiss the scared guy. Lee felt Gaara's nose brush over his and he brought his face up so that they could kiss. Gaara put his hands around Lee's waist. Lee was suddenly eager to try his new methods. He suddenly remembered that everything was written in his note. It took a moment, but he remembered that hands on the back and the back of the neck were ok. So that was what he started with. Gaara determined that a little experimentation with Lee wouldn't scare him off… hopefully. He kissed Lee's neck and licked behind his ear. Lee went an even deeper shade of red. Now, Lee had been just taking 'notes' before Gaara walked in. The heat in Lee's tracksuit was building again. A whimper came from Lee's lips as he tried to hold on to Gaara's shoulders for support. Gaara smiled in to the crook of his neck. Gaara's hand felt up Lee's side, under his shirt. Lee head touched the wall and he leaned the rest of his body in the cool plaster. Gaara took two steps to be flush with Lee's body. This was by far the most they had done. Gaara was getting a little too enthusiastic. Once Lee could understand what was going on and regained the ability to control his limbs, he brought his hands to Gaara's face. He got the frenzied man to kiss him again. This time, Lee had known how the whole French kiss worked. The premise was to be as close as you could, using just your mouth. Gaara moaned in to Lee's mouth. Lee couldn't help but smile at his accomplishment. He had made Gaara moan for the first time. Lee got bold and mimicked Gaara's hand under his own shirt. The tight, black concert tee bunched as Lee's hand traveled upward. There was a trick Lee had learned and used it as his ace in the hole. His thumb brushed over Gaara's nipple, making the red head gasp.

The scene had moved to the bed, Lee under the dominant Gaara. Gaara's shirt had disappeared and Lee's was in the process of getting lost. They had established that it was quite the right time for sex. They were just going to have a little fun. The material of Lee's shirt slipped off and Gaara attacked the freshly exposed skin. Lee twisted under Gaara's kisses. Gaara came back up to face Lee and kissed him passionately so he could distract him. A hand had gotten between Lee and his waist band. There wasn't much that Lee could do to stop him. Gaara's hand stroked Lee's hard member, making the poor boy a sputtering mess.

"Gaara… N-no sex, just…ah—" Lee was trying to get a point across but his brain was no longer doing the thinking.

"I know," Gaara smiled, "I'll behave…" he growled in to Lee's belly. The breath over his stomach made Lee's stomach tense, showing off all his muscles. Gaara's mind went in to overdrive. He had pulled Lee's track pants down, by miracle, he missed Lee's briefs. Lee sat strait up.

"What are you doing?" Lee was in shock and he wasn't that comfortable with all this that had been going on. Gaara stopped molesting the frightened man and sat up. "I-I don't think we should continue this…" Lee looked off to the side. Gaara tried not to be mad at Lee for being inexperienced, but he was running out of reasons. They both collected themselves and get ready for the diner. They didn't say much the entire time. Gaara hid in the bathroom, fixing his hair and eyeliner. Lee was wondering what track suit would go best with a lover's dispute. By the time six o'clock came, they mechanically left the dorm and headed for the restaurant.


	9. Here's to all the fall aparts tonight

So, I managed to write this chapter and study for my final, all with out my glasses! I broke them and I had to glue them back together. I was cleaning them and they split in two! I used a glue gun and tape to keep them funtioning untill I can get some new ones. I look like Harry Potter minus the cool wizard thingy...

Ok, I know I said mild lemons but... I think there is enough lemon in here to feed a small army. Keep in mind that there will be some man on man sex in this chapter.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto

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Temari eyed the couple at the right side of the table. Lee and Gaara had not said one word all night, not even to each other. Kakashi and Iruka tried to keep the conversation focused on them but Temari wasn't fooled. There was something going on and she was going to sniff it out. Gaara pushed the pasta around his plate, he hadn't even tried it but it had gone cold.

"So, Temari," Iruka pulled the blonde's attention back to him, "how is the fashion industry these days?"

"Hot and cold," she coolly replied, staring her at her brother, "It has its moments, were going back to the bold colours for the fall." Iruka was not in to clothing per se, but anything to keep Temari from digging in to the hostile couple across from him. No one needed to hear an argument tonight.

"Kakashi," Iruka turned to his man, "Weren't you going to Tokyo for a conference next month?" Kakashi snapped back to reality, he had been daydreaming what the make-up sex would be like when Iruka found out that he was to blame for the couple's woes, and then realized he was still madly in love with Kakashi, even though he was a handful.

"Yes," Kakashi nodded, "Tokyo University is, ahem, hosting a convention of the arts and I have been asked to give a lecture." Gaara sighed and leaned back in to his chair. His head rested in the back of the chair so he could stare at the ceiling, because it was so much more interesting than the conversation. All he wanted to do was go the club, get drunk and go home, alone. When Lee stopped him, he knew it was because Lee was a novice and he tried not to take it personally. But there is only so many 'no's a person could hear before they start to think of reasons why. Lee was so uncomfortable but he kept his smile on his face, ate all his food and nodded with the conversation. He felt bad that he was the cause of Gaara's awful mood. It wasn't like he didn't want Gaara in that way, he was scared of making a fool of himself in bed. Gaara took things too far, too fast and Lee panicked. Lee was just overwhelmed. He had never gone through anything like this before. Temari halted the waiter and asked for the check. It was time to put an end to the uncomfortable diner.

Buddy's was only four blocks from the restaurant and Temari wanted to walk to get some fresh air and persuaded the guys to agree. Kakashi had put his arm over Iruka's shoulders. Temari was carrying a conversation with the two professors while walking along side them. The grouchy pair were left to follow the life of the party. Lee took note of the physical contact between Kakashi and Iruka. It was something that Gaara and he didn't do a lot of. Lee thought if they held hands, it might ease the tension. His fingers reached out to trace over Gaara's. Jade eyes met brown and Gaara walked farther away from Lee's side to keep him from trying again. Lee was discouraged and kept to his side of the sidewalk. He wondered if he was just not ready for being with some else. It seemed so easy for a couple like Kakashi and Iruka. He wished that he knew what the secret ingredient to their relationship was.

The crowd at Buddy's was thicker that the last time Lee had visited. It was packed to the ceiling with energy. Everyone came through the stairway and most headed for the bar, minus Lee.

"Tequila, double," Gaara ordered, "and a beer…" The bar tender was the guy from last week. He glared at Gaara.

"ID?" he drawled. Gaara nearly hit him in the face when he flashed his drivers. The bartender nodded. He started to pour Gaara's shots while everyone else ordered. He got the last person in the group, Temari. He had put Gaara's shots on the bar and was in process of filling Gaara's pint. Temari smiled at him and he forgot that he had a job to do. Gaara glared at the man who was eye fucking his sister. Soon, the beer began to flow over the edge of the glass, waking the gawking man. He removed the glass from under the tap and handed it to Gaara. He slapped his money on the bar and took his shot of tequila.

"Boys, play nice…" Temari scolded, "I'm Temari," she held out her hand to the man on the other side of the bar.

"Shikamaru," he nodded and took her hand. He was at a loss for words, his mind was preoccupied for the first time in his life. Gaara jumped off the barstool and walked away. He wasn't going to put up with this shit.

"Sorry about my brother—" Temari excused. Gaara just kept walking to the booth. It looked like it would not be any better than if Gaara had stayed at the bar. Lee was the only one at the booth, waiting for everyone to get their drinks. Lee noticed Gaara walking towards the table and straightened his posture. Gaara slumped in to the leather seat opposite Lee. He pulled the ash tray to his side of the table and lit up.

"You shouldn't smoke," Lee said quietly. Gaara had his elbows on the table. The black lined eyes and delicate jaw turned to face Lee. A blue spot light swept over the right side of Gaara's face, making Lee remember why he still wanted the man.

"You shouldn't start things that you can't finish…" Gaara retorted. He put the cigarette to his mouth and looked over the dance floor.

"You should listen to your own advice," Lee suggested. Gaara straightened his back and glared over the table.

"Now, what the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Gaara was not impressed with the new mean streak in Lee.

"I-I meant that you never commit to anything…" Lee looked at his hands and it dawned on him how his comeback could be seen as very cruel, "You join the wrestling team but don't quit smoking… You say that you want me then I have to beg to get you to look at me. You say you're not mad but I feel like I let you down… Why can't you tell me what you want?" Gaara had to look away from Lee. He had hit the nail on the head. If Gaara was always the victim, he would never have to take the blame. Lee did not push it any farther. Iruka sat next to Lee and Kakashi made Gaara move over one.

Naruto showed up at nine and pulled Gaara on to the dance floor once he saw the tension on the table. Itachi and Sasuke arrived ten minutes later. Itachi looked over the glum face and was surprised that he, for once, looked like the happiest person there. Everyone was getting tiered of the couple making the night a bust. Things were not going to get any better now that Naruto and Sasuke were in the same building.

"Can I stick them in a room together naked now?" Kakashi asked Iruka. The brunet glared at Kakashi. Sasuke could see Gaara and Naruto dancing together and decided enough was enough. He marched out to the dance floor and grabbed Naruto's wrist. He pulled the blonde off the dance floor and towards the bathrooms. Gaara simply continued on the dance floor by himself.

Sasuke kicked the door to the men's room wide open. Naruto was a little shocked by Sasuke's outburst. His hand released Naruto's wrist. They had stopped in the hall to the toilets, just before the urinals. Sasuke was staring intensely at the blonde. Naruto squirmed under the spotlight.

"Want to be with you…" Sasuke started breathlessly, "and only you. Fuck everyone else and their rumours. I don't care what they will say about me. I only care how you feel about me." Sasuke stopped to take a step closer to the big blue eyes staring at him. "I wouldn't give you up for all the riches in the world…" Naruto didn't know what to say. Sasuke put his hand on Naruto's cheek to wipe away a lone tear. Naruto hadn't even noticed had started to cry.

"Teme!" Naruto hit Sasuke in the chest, "Don't ever do that to me again!" Sasuke opened his arms and let Naruto curl up in them.

Itachi noticed that his little brother was nowhere to be seen. He looked over and saw Lee trying not to stare at Gaara. Itachi lifted an eyebrow. This was the little prick who had managed to get Gaara, and he was not on the dance floor with him. Itachi was appalled. It was a waste for no one to be dancing with a nice piece of ass.

"Troubles?" Itachi asked Lee. He could barely hear the man over the music but enough to catch his attention.

"Uh, yeah…" Lee looked down, "How can you tell?"

"If I were you, I would be down there right now…" Itachi pointed out, "half way to fucking him."

"Yeah, I don't know about that…" Lee admitted.

"What don't you know?" Itachi asked like it was a stupid question, "You either do or you don't."

"I don't think Gaara would be impressed…" Lee looked out at Gaara in the sea of movement.

"That doesn't matter," Itachi said, "Well, not until the next morning, but still you won't ever know until you try." Itachi went back to his search. He might have just hindered his efforts in getting between Gaara's thighs but he considered it part of his good deed of the year.

He was finally alone to just be himself. His hands floated over his head and his hips swung to the rhythm. Lee watched the red head move. It was more intoxicating than the drink that was given to him the first time he was here. Lee tried to not stare and kept his focus on the conversation at the booth. They were talking about the time Itachi nearly took a girl home thinking she was a drag queen. Itachi glared at all the people who could recite the story by heart. The song slowed and so did Gaara's hips. Lee was no longer aware of anything but Gaara. His feet moved without his permission. The steps down in to the pit of the dance floor came sooner than expected and he tripped down the first step. This caught the attention of some of the people, but most of all Gaara noticed him. Gaara glared at him but Lee ignored him and kept walking till he was nose to nose with him. Lee put his palms on Gaara's waist to slow dance like they were at a high school. They were unusually high on his waist and Lee hand no rhythm once he started to move them back and forth. Gaara had to smile at Lee's innocence. It was his charm. Gaara wrapped his arms around Lee's neck, pulling them close together. Lee was still nervous about earlier and kept his hands higher on Gaara's back. Gaara let his body sink in to the slow melody. He placed his forehead on Lee's chest, feeling the uneven heart beats. It made Gaara think of how this was scary the first time with someone else, let alone someone you knew had lots of experience. Lee put his chin on top of Gaara's head lightly. They stayed like that for what seemed like hours.

The song was at its climax, and Gaara lifted his head to be eye to eye with Lee. Gaara's lips met Lee's and the sparks flew all over again. The tingling in Gaara stomach, like he was thirteen all over again, made him press in to Lee's body. Lee pulled his arms in letting their bodies mould to each other. Lee broke the kiss and gazed in to Gaara's eyes.

"My dorm?" Lee asked. Gaara's smile broadened.

"Yeah," Gaara agreed, "I don't think Chouji is up for a three some tonight." They laughed and Lee took Gaara's hand in his. Lee lead them out to the stair way. They waved at Temari and Shikamaru on their way out and caught Sasuke and Naruto making out on the street. Naruto bade them goodbye as Sasuke pulled him in the direction of his apartment.

"Iruka…" Temari loomed over Iruka as Kakashi was groping his lap, "Aren't you supposed to be watching someone?" Iruka stood up and panned the club. The look on his face was priceless. Temari sat on Kakashi, where Iruka had just vacated, and leaned in to whisper to him, "He's kinda cute when he's in a panic…" Kakashi smiled and nodded, his eyes striping the man.

"I know…" Kakashi purred. "You like you got yourself a winner…" Shikamaru waked up to the booth and did not even have to ask. Temari took his hand and started to leave with the genius. Iruka's attention went to Shikamaru giving Temari bedroom eyes as they walked to the back exit. His mouth hung open in shock. Kakashi pulled Iruka back on his lap. Iruka was still trying to figure out what had happened. "You know… You owe me from the other night…"

Gaara rammed Lee's shoulders in to the wall. They were making their way to Lee's dorm. They had to stop every few feet to make out making the trip take much longer that it was. Lee dug in his jacket pocket to get his key out. Gaara slid his hand in to the pocket to help. Their fingers laced together around the key ring. Lee whipped around to unlock the door. Gaara kissed the back of his neck to say hurry up. They didn't say much, which worked out fine for both of them. Talking was not their forte tonight. Lee's hands started to shake and the key refused to go in to the slot. He took a deep breath and got it in. The door burst open and they fell on the floor. Gaara was on top of Lee, who, landed on his back. Lee frantically closed the door with his feet.

"You ok?" Gaara mumbled in to the kiss, not wanting his lips to leave Lee's. Lee nodded because he had no words available in his mind. It was filled with Gaara and his devilishly sexy body. Lee kicked off his shoes and Gaara followed. They got to their feet and Lee unzipped his jacket, all without separating. Lee had gotten over his fears of intimacy about two blocks ago. He put the irrational fear of Gaara not being impressed with him in the bedroom. It was supposed to be just between them, Lee shouldn't try to compare himself to every other guy Gaara had been with. He was still nervous as hell but he knew that Gaara was the guy that he wanted to do this with.

Their lips quickly parted to get their shirts off. Gaara's hands spread out over Lee's toned torso. The feeling of the tanned skin on Gaara's made him hard, but he let Lee make the next make the next move. Lee pushed Gaara down on to the bed. He crawled up Gaara's body, still unsure where to start first.

"What do you want?" Lee asked innocently. He was completely honest. He had no clue where Gaara would like Lee to start. Gaara was mildly flattered that his new lover was asking him what he wanted instead of just assuming what felt good to Gaara. Lee stared up at Gaara, waiting for a response.

"Um, touch my chest…" Gaara was not used to giving orders.

"Here?" Lee put his hand on the middle of Gaara's breastbone. Gaara took Lee's hand and put it next to his nipple. Lee's face flushed. He knew what had happened last time he went there. The heat of Lee's hand made Gaara crave the touch. Lee still was unsure that this was the right thing to do.

"God damn it! Lee," Gaara covered his eyes. He knew he had just killed the mood with his impatience again. He waited for Lee to get off him and leave. Lee remembered what Itachi told him, it would only matter in the morning. Now, he had to so his best and what felt right. This wasn't something Lee could take notes on or practice until it was perfect. He needed Gaara and that was it.

Gaara was tempted to peek down to see what caused Lee to sit still. His belt flopped open and his fly was undone before he could take his hands off his eyes. Lee ripped the belt from its loops. Gaara's eyes nearly popped out of his head.

"Lee…?" Gaara asked not sure if Lee had gotten in to some alcohol at the club. Lee leaned forward and kissed Gaara hard. He bit his lip causing him to gasp, letting Lee have control over his mouth. He pulled at the red hair, gaining complete access to Gaara's throat. "Lee, nugh… what are you…?"

"I want you so bad…" Lee growled. He pressed his member down on to Gaara's that was tenting in his skin tight jeans, "I don't care if I fuck up… I just want you…" Gaara was worried he had created a monster. Lee had completely let go of his inhibitions. He stayed still while Lee molested his chest with kisses. Lee reached one of Gaara's hard nubs. His tongue darted out and licked it back and forth. Gaara moaned and put his hand on the back of Lee's head. The shiny hair slipped through his fingers like velvet. Lee was panting to catch his breath. The noises Gaara made were driving Lee wild. He ripped the tight jeans off Gaara's pale legs. Lee stood up to try and get his own pants off. Gaara sat up and helped. The drawstring came undone and Gaara pulled down the pants and briefs to the ground. Lee's hard member twitched in the cold air. Gaara got on his knees and began to suck. Lee cried out in ecstasy. There weren't many experiences to compare to, but Lee deemed this one the best. Gaara took the liberty of letting his hand pull out his cock. He stroked himself in time with his mouth. Lee couldn't resist anymore. He pulled back and left Gaara on to his feet. Their eyes were glazed over and wanting. Lee turned Gaara around and pushed him in to the bed. Gaara was used to being the bottom and complied. He felt Lee's fingers at his lips and licked. He made sure they were decently moist before letting go, biting as they left his wet cavern. It wasn't long before Gaara was stretched and ready to go. The moans coming from his mouth said more than anything else. Lee lined up and took a really deep breath, the last one as a virgin. Gaara was flat on his stomach, face in the sheets. He bent his left knee to let Lee have more room. Lee tried to enter all at once and found that it was impossible. He got the tip in and had to slow down after Gaara put a hand on Lee's hip, telling him to stop. He was in to the hilt quicker than he thought and immediately grinded out a slow pace. Lee had balanced himself on his hands but his arms started to shake with excitement. The sweat on their bodies let them glide together. Gaara grabbed at the sheets when Lee picked up the pace. All the intensity had left him on the edge. He reached behind him to pull the black hair. Lee grunted and bit Gaara's shoulder. It would most definitely leave a mark tomorrow.

"Oh, fuck… Lee… Ah…" Gaara yelled in between thrusts. Gaara smirked at Lee's new found sexy. It seems that the star athlete was just a closet full of surprises. The first thing that came out of the closet, and the one every one could see, was he was gay, but the second thing would be just for Gaara to play with. His own personal monster in the closet. There were animalistic moans coming from the man who was giving Gaara the ride of his life. The room was going white and Gaara's nails were making holes in the sheet. Lee had lost all ability to do anything but hump Gaara. His head started to rest on Gaara's back. Lee pulled on Gaara's limp frame and got him on his knees. Gaara propped himself in his elbows. Lee resumed his trusts but in addition, pulled on Gaara's cock. He reached around and tried to keep the rhythm, balance and jerking Gaara all at the same time. Gaara put his hand over Lee's, making him take over one of Lee's responsibilities. They both rushed the timing to get their release. Gaara went double time on his dick. Lee felt his testicles coil in anticipation and they both struggled to keep breathing. The only sound in the room, besides skin on skin, was their heavy panting. Gaara came first, spilling all over the white sheets, beads blended in to the pale folds. His screams of ecstasy filled the previously still silence. Once Lee started to cum, he stopped his thrusts and filled Gaara with hot lust. He groaned in to Gaara's back, muffling the sound.

Lee woke up to knocking on the door. Gaara had fallen asleep on his chest, his ear to Lee's heart. The sun had been up for a while, Lee guessed it was twelve by the way the sun was sitting at his window. The knocking persisted and Lee snuck out from underneath Gaara to see who it was. He had to go around to the other side of the bed to find his pants. He watched Gaara who went completely undisturbed by Lee's moving around. Even the noise from the hall had not woken the red head. He could see bite marks all over Gaara back. They were stark over the porcelain skin. Lee could not figure out what had come over him. In fact, it scared him a little. He was the nice guy, not the guy who bends his boyfriend over and takes him right then and there. Lee walked cautiously towards the door. The deadbolt clicked and Lee pulled on the handle. Naruto was standing at the door with Iruka.

"Morning Green Beast!" Naruto was holding a bag of doughnuts. Iruka smiled and waved. They looked down the hall at a person walking towards them. Lee leaned out the doorway to see who it was. Temari had a dishevelled man in toe while she marched to Lee's dorm.

"This kid named Chouji says that Gaara never made it back to his dorm last night," she announced. Iruka looked at the half naked Lee with suspicion.

* * *

So, I was thinking of doing some one shots of the surounding story lines. Is there any that people would like to hear in particular?

Let me know! Byebye!


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